Humorous and funny Voice poems and/or funny poems about Voice. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Voice funny poems!
Written by
Sunlite Wanter
Categories:
humor, relationship,
Mother's Voice
Hush, my dear mother, say no more
(Shut up your criticizing, out the door)
I know you love me, want my best,
(You’re putting my temper to an acid test)
I’m trying Jenny Craig, I know I’ll win
(Your suggestions are tantamount to starvation sin!)
Hush, my dear mother, say no more.
Written by
Line Gauthier
Categories:
dance, funny, judgement, voice,
All Pirates Not Created Equal
Type casting Pirates of Penzance
Lining up those who’ll sing and dance
Some aced the illusion
Others beyond delusion
Laughing so hard I wet my pants
AP: 3rd place 2020, Honorable Mention 2020
Submitted on April 8, 2019 for contest PIRATE THEMED LIMERICK sponsored by TANIA KITCHIN - RANKED 4TH
Written by
John Lawless
Categories:
humor, voice,
Vent-Riloquist
within my mind like stringless mimes
reside the voices of discontent
discussing in their troubled tones
the conundrum of implied intent
“I’ll say this”, and “he’ll say that”
“she’ll do thus”, and “I’ll do so”
no invites to cerebral tea
for conversations of “me with me”
for all the puppets in my head
dance to tunes I choose to play
none have the voice to boldly say
“move on, you dwell in yesterday”
©6/18/2018
for Ventriloquist Poetry Contest/Anthony Slausen
Written by
Trinity Chasara
Categories:
addiction, cute love, dedication, devotion, funny love, love
I Love the Sound of Your Voice
I love the sound of your voice
My heart sings when you speak
Turns into symphonies and orchestras
Of sweet melodious bliss
That when my ear tastes
My inner joy swells and abounds
Like a river in spate
Unfettered, deep, and resounding
Fresh as the medleys of life
That feed from infinite vastness
I love the sound of your voice
It is soft as doves, captivating and beautiful
Granted to hear now and ever after
Through morning, noon and night
Summer, winter and spring
Then I would gather each sentiment
Like lilies and toss
Each scent that is hope and peace
Upon the bed of my soul
Where the voice that I love to hear
Would come to me with angel kisses
And be my lullaby.
Written by
Scott Harris
Categories:
angst, giggle, humorous, voice, wisdom,
Knot In My Stomach
Annoying knot right in the pit
Of my stomach, please stop it!
You twist and churn with fear and dread
Echo voices in my head
Have you any clue who I am
What I'm up to as a man?
What's your job, why were you hired?
I think you suck, that's it, you're fired
Here's your pink slip, now be gone
You been here now for far too long
Sorry there's no space for you
I've simply too much left to do
I wish you well, it's been a blast
Redecorate your room at last
Dust the Cobb webs, walls are painted
Furniture's been re situated
Loving life, this brand new space
Without you up in my face
Happy feeling at peace with me
At home, in love, completely free
Written by
Sara Kendrick
Categories:
funny, introspection, life, love, mother, on work and working
Her Voice Say
.
When tired from sweeping with the storebought broom
I'd lean against not wanting to resume
Momma said, "Nusing your bab?"
I would sweep, under breath crab
Now would love to hear her say, "Clean your room!"
(Momma would say nusing not nursing..Bab is instead of baby..)
Written by
Cindi Rockwell
Categories:
crazy, funny, humorous,
To a Voice In My Head
I don't know who you really are, but I love the things you mutter!
Like, "Eat more chocolate! Fat is in! That biscuit needs more butter!"
You said the limit is "Suggested speed. Just hit the pedal harder."
You tell me to just let one rip then accuse another farter!
I almost passed on expensive shoes that looked and fit just great,
Because my account was overdrawn! Thank God you set me straight!
And as I sit here penning this, I love you more than ever.
You were right, I feel so good, having killed my boyfriend Trevor!
Written by
Jan Allison
Categories:
conflict, humorous, senses, sound, voice,
He Turns a Deaf Ear
wife’s loquacity
spouse turns his hearing aid off
silence is golden
Senryu Contest
Sponsored by Mick Talbot
7/6/18
Written by
Paula Goldsmith
Categories:
fun, humor, new year, poems, uplifting, voice
Funny New Years Resolutions For 24
Quote By Poet "The pen is the tongue for many writers."
Welcome to the new twenty-four,
I am laughing on the floor.
Pen you need to change,
tongue you need to rearrange.
No talking just write a lot more.
Written by
Jan Allison
Categories:
humorous, music,
Losing My Voice
I
attempt
to sing a song
hubby covers his ears
says I sound like a cat in pain
so I’ll never attempt karaoke
though I was once head chorister
in a
choir!
Ring My Bell Poetry Contest
Sponsored by John Anderson
06/30/21
Written by
Don Pettinelli
Categories:
bird, humorous, morning, song, summer, voice
Bird Song Serenade
It was early one hot summer morning,
When I heard off key singing through the air,
I looked to see who upset my morning
And bring peace and quiet to the morning air.
I looked around for the cause of the sound
To help give me a renewed peace of mind,
High on a wire was the source of the sound
It was an old black bird that stressed my mind.
I thought if I yelled he would fly away,
I didn't want him in my yard all day,
Nothing I did seemed to scare him away,
Why did I let one bird ruin my day?
The bird couldn't help the sound of his voice,
And I should be a lover of bird songs.
Written by
David Dowling
Categories:
childhood, children, funny, hope, imagination, life
The Voice
One sunny day in the month of May, a Young Grape heard a sound.
“Help a soul in need, and never kick one when it’s down.
Treat others how you wish to be, for everybody should,
do good deeds for no reason other than to do good.
Respect opinions and beliefs, it’s character that tells,
your opinion is just that, to someone else, you’re someone else.”
The Young Grape shouted “who gives these messages? Who’s the liaison?"
-And an Old Grape spoke up from afar; “twas I, the voice of Raisin!”
Written by
Jslambert Mister Roboto
Categories:
funny, introspection, life, on writing and words, people, philosophy
And the Voice Said-----
Contractual agreements with publisher caused DELETION
JS Lambert
Written by
Paula Goldsmith
Categories:
animal, giggle, humor, uplifting, voice, word play
The Donkey vs The Tiger
Hold on to your many stripes
Before you blow out your pipes
I can hear you loud and clear
Stop acting so cavalier
Cool off then ride on one of the bikes
Written by
Jill Spagnola
Categories:
how i feel, humor, voice,
Designers of Dissidence
Designers of Dissidence
Scandalous slubberdegullions
Credulous crepehangers
Haughty harridans
Laudable loblollies
Enigmatic evildoers
Patronizing poltroons
Problematic paramours
Slanderous spirits
Sunshine Williams
Written by
Catherine Labeau
Categories:
boyfriend, brother, confusion, dream, humorous, voice
Do I Know You
my heart my breath of dreams
a drool from the corner of of my lips
I wake on an empty bed
to discover my worth to feed the furs around me
a cat purring on my chest not looking for a rump
early morning and the small dog under blankets
I am the reborn virgin to be discovered and convoked
to share nothing.
the love long past I am glad you are gone brother
as they thought we were sibling.
Written by
Gershon Wolf
Categories:
humor, political, satire, spoken word, voice,
Speaking of Bullhorns
A politician using a bullhorn
places it over the mouth
Though given the stuff that comes out
it ought to be positioned down south
Written by
Linda Alice Fowler
Categories:
funny, humorous, hurt, husband, silly, voice
Kill the Shrill
there was a young man from Seville
whose wife's voice was chillingly shrill
he said please shut up
he’d more than enough
sending him looking for advil!
(caveat: no endorsement of product intended)
Written by
Jan Allison
Categories:
how i feel, humorous, silence, voice,
He Just Adores the Sound of His Own Voice
an incessant bore
he droned on and on and on …
where’s my gaffer tape!
Based on experience at our meal out last night – he dominated the conversation at our end of the table and then didn’t stop twittering on even during the talk on the Chinese New Year.
01/26/18
Written by
Paula Goldsmith
Categories:
giggle, how i feel, together, voice, words, world
AI
ai
not for me.
a raging robot
now taking over the world.
what will we all do when ai comes for you.
Written by
L Milton Hankins
Categories:
history, humor, voice, woman,
Suffragist
There once lived a lady in Scranton
Named Elizabeth Cady Stanton
She dared to promote
Women’s right to vote,
‘Tis said she threw many a tantrum.
written January 14, 2022
Written by
Gershon Wolf
Categories:
horse, humorous, voice,
Sign On a Barn Door
The sign on the barn door
Says 'Not a Good Neigh-bor'
I speak, of course,
of a dam ~ hoarse
______________________
a 'dam' is a female parent
horse, (of course)
Written by
Deb M
Categories:
anti bullying, humor, voice,
Smug
Smugness in human behaviour
Is such an unappealing trait
A smug word ,a smug smile
Only provokes hate
If a smug superior attitude
Is all you offer and deliver
Zip your mouth and lock it
And throw the key in the river!!
Written by
Mona Ebel
Categories:
hello, humor,
Voice Mail Greeting
There once was a girl named Mona
Who screened all her calls on her phone-a
She said, "At the tone
Make yourself known"
Or she'll think that you're full of bologna!
Written by
Brian Strand
Categories:
humor, voice,
RECOGNITION 2x2
hiku
VOICE MAIL my message CHOICE
succinct&distinct
short&original..
so eco-nomi-cal