Humorous and funny Violence poems and/or funny poems about Violence. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Violence funny poems! Also, try our sister website's powerful search engine for poems or see our other Violence Poems.
Poem Details | by
Poet Destroyer A |
Categories:
adventure, anti bullying, boat, humor, slavery, violence, voyage,
```Pirate Bay the Haiku```
pirates fierce and mean
drowning fish, sea to sea
parrots on their butt
```Polly Wants A Cracker```
bloodthirst & brutal
Quartermaster Gone Wild
dirty wings on deck
```Sea World Adventure```
ship crew goes on strike
sailing the Caribbean
wooden leg splashing
~*~
Poem Details | by
Jessica Amanda Salmonson |
Categories:
animal, children, humorous, nature, nursery rhyme, pets, violence,
You shouldn't poke at monkeys
unless you're a dummkopf
Who gets precisely what's deserved --
your fingers bitten off.
Poem Details | by
Dorian Petersen Potter |
Categories:
confusion, film, funny, humor, humorous, irony, violence,
(Limerick)
Batman and Robin hit the Joker
But their blow was only a croaker
The Joker hit back
But instead hit Jack
Who said "I'm glad, the Joker's an smoker!
Dorian Petersen Potter
Aka ladydp2000
Copyright@2014
09.16.2014
Poem Details | by
Volodymyr Knyr |
Categories:
food, fruit, humorous, people, spoken word, violence, words,
The bigger/the richer/the faster the peach,
the better the chance to catch up someone's speech.
Volodymyr Knyr
2014
Poem Details | by
Lisa Costigan |
Categories:
drink, funny love, humorous, violence,
Just a normal Sunday sitting on my chair
When all of sudden in walked my auntie uncle Claire
What the hell you doing barging in like that??
He said your not going fu**ing believe it? I just ran over your Cat
I said the only pussy in this house is my other half,
We played a few drinking games and i beat him at charades
He soon ad enough of that tho so i pulled out deck cards then he stared moaning reckon the games i play are hard.
Well i had enough of his lip i couldn't take no more
so rubbed his face on cheese grater and now hes bloody sore.
Poem Details | by
Anthony Beck |
Categories:
anger, angst, giggle, music, violence,
I am standing
In a line scene
Cuz my body
Needs its caffeine
And in front of me some dink
Orders a confusing drink
Now he’s changing ‘round his order
With our patients growing shorter
And a sword from
Someone’s pocket
Now sticks through the
Guy’s eye socket
Du du du du
Du du du du
Du du du-du du-du du-du...
Poem Details | by
Jessica Amanda Salmonson |
Categories:
death, funny, humor, life, murder, repetition, violence,
Am I dead yet?
No.
Am I dead yet?
No.
Am I dead yet?
BASH GUNCH CRUSH!
Yes gawdam it.
Poem Details | by
Gail Foster |
Categories:
animal, emotions, humor, philosophy, truth, violence, wisdom,
Alan the mystic
Aardvark
Rejected wrath and
Drama
Violence and ire
Alan said
Result in endless
Karma
by Gail
Poem Details | by
Randy Johnson |
Categories:
funny, humor, husband, violence, wife,
I forgot to set the parking brake.
So now my wife's car is in the lake.
You're looking at a man who can never catch a break.
My wife kicked my *** just because I made a mistake.
She broke my left leg and I'm having to use a crutch.
I don't blame her for being mad but coming at me with a chainsaw is a bit too much.
(This is a fictional poem)
Poem Details | by
Kevin Shaw |
Categories:
funny, nonsense, silly, snow, violence, winter,
In the Snow
As I was walking in the Snow,
I met a friend I didn't know.
You know me, I'm the one,
Stole your wife in Eighty One.
I smiled, then buried him in the snow
Poem Details | by
Gerald Dillenbeck |
Categories:
destiny, earth, health, humanity, humor, power, violence,
I remain both surprised and alarmed
when revolutionary entrepreneurs,
AltRight survivalists,
poor and terrified AfricanAmerican and Hispanic young adult U.S. males,
and females,
and the National Rifle Association
vociferously agree with Chairman Mao
"Power is found at the end of a gun."
While alarmed
because violence breeds further mindless violence,
I continue to be surprised
because even a child could notice
Power originates from Earth's revolving
and enlightening
relationship to the Sun.
All other points of origin
are secondary,
derivative,
and perhaps not to be made too anthro-centrically much of.
Poem Details | by
Jessica Amanda Salmonson |
Categories:
animal, humor, insect, murder, nursery rhyme, violence, word play,
Jaro was a killer
He bonked me on the head
He laughed and laughed
"You're dead, you're dead!"
Is what the killer Jaro said.
But I jumped up and kicked his crotch
That knocked him down a knotch
"You're daft! You're daft!"
Said I, said I, the woolly caterpillar.
Poem Details | by
Vernon Witmer |
Categories:
anti bullying, bullying, confidence, humor, people, recovery from, violence,
you said I was a wuss;
you said I couldn’t take it.
You said I’d make a fuss;
you said I wouldn’t make it.
what you said did not make sense;
you didn’t think I had the guts;
now you’ll feel the difference;
with my new knee in your nuts.
Poem Details | by
Mark Toney |
Categories:
animal, conflict, humor, men, violence,
A well-groomed matador José
Liked to moisturize with Oil of Olay
His hands lost their grip
The cape it did slip
He was gored as he cried out "¡Olé!"
Poem Details | by
Ryan Graham |
Categories:
humor, humorous, violence,
Why do I drink coffee?
It always makes me poo.
And when I smell that steaming turd,
it makes me think of you.
As you float there in the water,
I like to think you’re dead.
I pretend that I have killed you,
that I pinched off your head.
Poem Details | by
Jessica Amanda Salmonson |
Categories:
abuse, anger, bullying, humor, satire, silly, violence,
I'm gonna spank Frank and then I'll whip Pip
Before I slug Bug, I'm gonna slap Cap.
I wanna hit Kit; I wanna smack Mac
I'll never like Ike, and I'll destroy Roy.
So I could lick Mick before I kick Rick
Why don't you die Sly, and say goodbye Guy.
Poem Details | by
Randy Johnson |
Categories:
funny, humor, humorous, violence,
It's Black Friday and I grabbed the last iPad.
When I grabbed it, it sure made people mad.
One man kicked me in the crotch and another got his foot stuck in my ***.
Black Friday turns people into beasts, they sure don't have any class.
A man said if I didn't hand over the iPad, he would kidnap my wife's mother.
I told him to take the old crow, they deserve each other.
Black Friday brings out the worst in people and that's sad.
I'll break my foot off in your *** if you try to grab my iPad.
(This is a fictional poem.)
Poem Details | by
Valsa George |
Categories:
anger, funny love, violence,
As one freshly released from Bedlam
He asked her, intending no harm
"Can I kiss you madam"?
As if he were her Adam
Her fist fell on his cheek ‘dum’ ‘dum’!
Poem Details | by
Gerald Dillenbeck |
Categories:
culture, health, humor, power, usa, violence,
I hear in the Ukraine
there's a comedian
with no prior political experience
who has become their new President.
I wonder
they did not hear
we tried this model in the U.S.
a couple years ago
With predictable tragic/comedic results
not the least bit friendly
to public multicultural health
sold out
to support feudal monoculturing wealth
of not so funny kleptocrats.
Poem Details | by
Jessica Amanda Salmonson |
Categories:
body, character, corruption, funny, hate, murder, violence,
Colonel Flighty is a cad
Thinks himself a funny wag
Thinks he's mighty, ain't that sad
"Look at me! A strutting stag!"
Jiggly belly, jowls that sag
Throat all phlegmy, such a drag
Trousers smelly, makes you gag
Leaky colostomy bag.
Toss him quickly drown a crag
If he lives we'll be so mad
End his sickly feeble brag
Hear his fading shout, "Egad!"
Poem Details | by
John Beam |
Categories:
humorous, parody, satire, violence,
Butterflies and chickens who knows, Maybe the next catch phrase
Poem Details | by
Gerald Dillenbeck |
Categories:
caregiving, humor, integrity, mental illness, psychological, usa, violence,
I wonder if this is an Elder RightBrain epidemic,
this confusion of NRA origins
as National Rifle Association
or National Republican Army;
A distinction of labels
perhaps without difference,
Sharing the same U.S. RedMeat population
of awesomely hungry pirates.
Poem Details | by
Gershon Wolf |
Categories:
giggle, snow, violence, weather,
A weather wizard
delivered a blizzard
to Chicago yesterday
If I weren’t so lily-livered
I’d have torn out his gizzard
~ right away
Poem Details | by
Anil Deo |
Categories:
bible, business, god, humor, jesus, jewish, violence,
Why was Jesus a Leftist? please extrapolate.
In John 2, Jesus overturns the money-changers' tables
In Mark 11, and Matthew 23, He cleansed the Temple of trade
He got to the City, took a left turn, not right to Roman garrisons
Jesus made a left, upset trade, earned his stripes as a LEFTIST.
Smith Wigglesworth, on the Bible, the only book he learned to read at 23: "When I read the newspaper I feel dirtier than I went in. When I read the Bible I feel cleaner than I went in. And I like feeling clean."
Poem Details | by
Olabosoye Wemimo Olaoluwa |
Categories:
art, betrayal, hilarious, pollution, silly, vanity, violence,
Wickedness can be use for rapists
But what will one attach to plagiarists?