Funny Poems About River or River Funny Poems

Humorous and funny River poems and/or funny poems about River. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious River funny poems!

Written by Paula Goldsmith
Categories: fish, fishing, flower, humor, river, strength,

Big Brown Bear

big strong furry brown
fishing for salmon with paws~
prancing through flowers
  
Date Written: 4/12/2022
3 Place
Howmanysyllables.com
Wild Animal Haiku Poetry Contest Haiku poetry form only.
   
Sponsored by: Tania Kitchin

Written by A.O. Taner
Categories: betrayal, boat, change, computer, confusion, cool, crazy, cute love, emotions, fantasy, funny, funny love, heart, heartbroken, hello, irony, light, loneliness, lonely, lost love, love, love hurts, parody, relationship, river, romantic, sad love, satire, soulmate, voyage, wisdom,

Boat

I had my heart put on auto-pilot,
set to navigate towards you; 

the low-battery signal just came on,
I don't know what to do.


Written by Katherine Stella
Categories: adventure, art, education, funny, imagination, inspirational, mystery, nature, places, science fiction, sea, seasons, uplifting, visionary

Cry Me a River

at the mouth of cave
aqua insurgent brushstrokes
cry me a river

Written by Jan Allison
Categories: football, giggle,

Drowning In a River of Tears

Germany scored seven goals, poor Brazil is awash with tears
Guess they won’t need any rainfall for at least a hundred years

Jan Allison
9th July 2014

Written by Thomas Martin
Categories: cat, cool, funny, river, storm,

After the Shower

after the shower
two siamese cross the stream
playing in the water


Written by Robert Andrew Lyle
Categories: fun, funny, hope, humor, nature, river,

Hope Stick

I drop a stick down from the bridge
Into the waters far below
It carries my hopes with it
To see how far my stick will go

I am hoping it will travel far
And bounce upon the eddies
Missing all those obstacles
Going straight and fast and steady

I hope the bends to navigate
In the middle of the flow
To get caught by vegetation 
Means there’s nowhere left to go

My stick has now bobbed out of sight
In the sunlight’s bright reflection
I hope to see it soon again
Still going in the right direction

Not all my hopes on this stick rest
Because that would be silly
I have another in my hand
To throw into the Swilly      
( Swilly is a river in Donegal  Ireland )

Written by Julie Grenness
Categories: dad, family, father, giggle, growing up, river, time,

My Father Used To Say

MY FATHER USED TO SAY.......

My father used to say...
"Don't come back if you drown!"
He often acted the clown...
My endearing mum used to say..
"They'll come home in time for tea,
Wait and see.."
My Father used to say...
"Kids come home when they're hungry!
Now don't come back if you drown...."
My Father was always playing the clown..
River of time, all water under the bridge,
Time and the river, flowing away. 
Things my Father used to say.

Written by John Beam
Categories: allusion, humor, irony, psychological, river, word play, youth,

Juvenile

When the young Nile decided to run opposite of its peers.

Written by Arthur Vaso
Categories: art, crazy, fishing, funny, poets, river,

The Naked Truth

Whispers dance inside my head
Reflections glance at a substance dead
Confirmations of my unpoetical pen
Only white spaces mirrored back
No one has a word to say
The mirror tells I should go away
The oceans piers toss me deep
Into contemplation of my rude upkeep
Sheepish sins, bitter gin
The naked truth
No one reads my scribbles doo
Oh how my dribble makes me blue

Written by John Lawless
Categories: fishing, humor,

River Wok

River Wok

whiskered water cats
caught and cleaned in fresh fillet
sizzling river wok


John G. Lawless
8/27/2014
For PD’s River Walk(?) contest

Written by Earl Schumacker
Categories: caregiving, feelings, flower, funny, health, nature, river,

Achoo Haiku

Achoo Haiku

Cold swift river

Sneezes on the lotus shore

Take 2 aspirin

Written by Christina Hons
Categories: fun, hope, humor, light, river, water, weather,

What I Accomplished Today

What I had planned for the day is no longer an option for me.
20 minutes on a full body vibration machine
30 minutes in a sauna. Same for the oxygen bar.
A free lunch with my friend, but I cannot get to my car.
It has been pouring down rain for a few days. Everything is starting to flood.
Today I will be unable to meet my friend with a microscope who's fascinated by blood.
Turned on the television. Someone discussing Greek and Roman Parthenons.
Oh goody! What joy! It's an Ancient Aliens marathon.
Flipped open my journal looking for something to do.
Guess I'll enter a poetry contest or two.

May 15, 2015

Written by Orma Sullivan
Categories: funny,

River Conch

If you want 
to hear the Amazon,
hold a banana
up to your ear.

Written by Shane Solomon
Categories: black african american, funny, people,

A River In Egypt Called Denial

I live in self denial
Can't bring myself to realize
Or even admit the truth
That I'm really black

Written by Dorian Petersen Potter
Categories: funny,

A Young Girl From River Front

(Limerick) 

A young girl from Old River Front 
Got so hungry she went on a hunt 
But got more than she care 
When encountered a bear 
So she ran, cuz that was too much to confr'nt! 


Dorian Petersen Potter 
Aka ladydp2000 
Copyright@2014

Written by Molly Cooper
Categories: funny, nature

River In Early July

Flowing, sparkling, refreshingly clear
Dipped in my toes, ah yes too cold -just as I feared








For John Freemans Contest

Written by Seren Roberts
Categories: funny,

Man Lived By a River

There was a man who lived by a river
Wasn’t a taker but a giver
Gave away his only vest
Cos his friend was cold and perplexed.
Now all he can do is shiver

Written by Gregory Golden
Categories: funny

What a Lovely River Smile

Have you ever
Seen a hippopotamus
Running in cadence,
Alongside an
African, Kenyan man
Oh, what a lovely  
River smile

Written by James Horn
Categories: allegory, allusion, analogy, humorous,

Best About My River

Best About My River

What I always liked best about my river
Was many dreams to me it would deliver
And another and another was here waiting
For me and many more river kept making.

Put dream in bottle and down river did send
Which I wanted delivered to a waiting friend
Who on other side of ocean was waiting there
To read my brilliant poem beyond compare.

Not only was a dream nut also a poem inside
He picked up poem and read with much pride
Remember derelict Trump I had detected
Republican Party refused to have him selected.

Ho Ho Jim Horn

Written by Jan Oskar Hansen
Categories: funny, history, music, music,

Love By the River

Love by the River. 

I carried the old fashion gramophone,
she carried the records to the river. 
We sat and I kissed her while listening 
to 1959 records.

Let´s have a dip. Naked we swam in 
the moonlit river that cleanses disgust.
Her armpits had the aroma of clover

Started gramophone again, music back 
then was so trite, lyrics boring and her 
body looked enchanting in moonlight. 

I threw the bloody music machine into 
the river, she did ditto with the records. 
We made love in stillness as trout waked 
I regretted not having  brought a fishing rod.

Written by Rico Leffanta
Categories: beauty, giggle, girl, health, native american, relationship, river,

Hoo Noo

I met a girl in Cibecue
Who did not quite know what to do
Then down by the river
She turned Indian-giver
And I ended up with the flu

Written by Robert Isaacs Chiwala
Categories: beach, cute, cute love, feelings, fun, funny love, international,

River Side Scene

Gone for the view
Sometimes maybe a swim
Or just fishing
In a quiet shore

Just alone gazing at each other
After an hour -a fruitless catch
Sighing, frustrated giving up
In each other's arms comforting

A strange feeling sparkled with a kiss
The warmth like never felt before
Waters, sand, grass and the sky yet watching
Only playful taunts revealed in giggles

Written by John Lawless
Categories: humor, nature, river,

River Moments a Six Pack of Senryu

the swans hiss
parental obligation
                       …warn the intruder

sunning turtles roll
drunks falling off of bar stools
                             …curse the kayaker

water lilies
mimicking ice cream cones
                             …licked by the bees

floating overhead
an Osprey admires himself
                            …a silent river

a pickerel darts
a frog croaks
            …not just wordplay

the Geese look surprised
a cool riffling of feathers
                          …instinctual need

John G. Lawless
©7/29/2022

Written by Mike Jones
Categories: humor, night, river, summer,

Summer Night On the River

The fading sunlight angles through the trees –
Strange alchemy that turns the river gold;
And on this balmy night with scarce a breeze
To trouble little ducklings gay and bold,
They sail and scoot around without a care
And do not see, submerged, the danger there.
In silence, in the shallows, lurks a pike.
He’s long and lean with hunger. Lies in wait :
Young ducklings for dinner, that’s what he’d like,
But then, a passing heron seals their fate.
He splashes down amongst the waving reeds
And scatters ducklings safely back upstream,
	Apart from one, who paddles without fear
	Downstream, accelerates towards the weir !

Written by Probir Gupta
Categories: beauty, books, hilarious, imagery, life, light, river,

Slight Dim Please

The lighting, it was over-bright
So much so that I could not read
Your book of hills and delta bright
The lighting, it was over-bright
This time can you tone it down slight
I understand you feel our need
The lighting, it was over-bright
So much so that I could not read
_________________________________
June 15, 2016