Humorous and funny Mythology poems and/or funny poems about Mythology. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Mythology funny poems!
Written by
Anthony Beck
Categories:
allusion, humorous, mythology, religion,
Whatchamacallit
A total whatchamacallit,
That absolute kinda deal;
We'll never know what it looks like,
Nor how it might taste or feel.
But we'll always recognize it
The minute it's not in sight.
And if you say you're skeptical,
A brouhaha you'll ignite.
Written by
Mike Martin
Categories:
adventure, hilarious, humor, humorous, myth, mythology, satire,
Big Mac
McMar’s old man didn't like him much
But he never wondered why
All sorts of horrid demons
Could seen in the old man's eye
McMar’s own mother, Doreeane
Couldn’t wait to deliver her son
They say he tipped the scale
Right around 10.1
The nurses couldn’t believe it
The young one brought him in
“Here’s your new Big Mac”, she said
With a happy little grin
Doree said, Oh, Motherload!
I’m having a heart attack
How in the world did you ever know
I was thinking of calling him Mac
Written by
Jimmi Canada
Categories:
baptism, beauty, city, eve, first love, funny, gender, god, history, independence day, mystery, mythology, night, obituary, raven, sea, silly, summer, sweet, teacher, world, yellow,
Roll On
Lauren Hill slow songs thrill,
they pop like a fast moving pill,
I am flopped on top of a junk food bill,
and running with a skunk who tells me to take in my fill-
like leading um' on into my dream,
I create a festering lean,
I rank every thought in order of how I like it,
and prep for a long time that's gonna break all the cycles.
Striding with my shrine,
as I shock a spine,
revitalize and prime-
as I preen and primp and chimp-
as I act like a pimp,
I black out and gimp,
skimp out on my dying moment because death is no shrimp!
Written by
Ken Duddle
Categories:
funny, mythology, satire,
The Snake
There once was a couple, called Adam and Eve
Who a little joke they did conceive
They told all, that as they walked
They met a snake that talked
But the plan backfired when it was believed.
Written by
Mike Martin
Categories:
christmas, humor, mythology, wife,
Mrs Claus
Christmas without Mrs. Claus
That could never be
Who would feed dear Santa
And trim the Christmas tree
Who would tie the ribbons
And fasten all the bows
Who would help the elves
Hang their stockings all in rows
Who would do the mending
And sew the giant sacs
Who'd care for all the reindeer
And polish up their racks
Who would keep dear Santa jolly
Keep him fat and warm
So he can ride the coldest skies
And weather any storm
All hail the unsung hero
Hooray for Mrs. Claus
The saving grace of Christmas
Best gal that ever was
Written by
Tom Arnone
Categories:
beauty, desire, humor, mythology, sensual, sexy, women,
The Eyes of Venus
Hot raptor breath
Push goosebumps to life
On the golden-honey flesh
Of a most desired sight.
Deeply tanned and rubenesque,
Unsheathed, scented shoulders.
Arms that distill without cause to beckon
The wills of the penile-brained knights.
Wallow in her moist pink flower.
Defend with your armor that nymphet tower.
But beware, Dear Sir, should your eye slip up
Two orbs of Venus power.
Written by
Shanity Rain
Categories:
beauty, birth, celebration, creation, culture, fish, future, god, history, humor, image, imagination, immigration, inspirational, life, magic, miracle, mystery, mythology, natural disasters, nature, night, nostalgia, ocean, old, science, sea, technology, voyage,
New Aquatic Species
Science in all fascination has discovered a species aquatic
Theorizing this new yet old species remained hidden as Merman
only to live in secret at the oceans floor the mermaid a tribe indigenous
once said to be myth yet all proof and technology film does not lie
Tsunamis has given the ocean a true glance of the man with webbed hands
The species communes with dolphins will be under a microscope to analyze ?
" The World is not ready to see what I have " Jacques Cousteau ~
to be entered in The Science contest ~
Written by
Rudolph Rinaldi
Categories:
funny, mythology,
The Cross On My Bedroom Wall
the cross on my bedroom wall
keeps away vampires and werewolves
but not mosquitoes
Written by
Vladimir Tumanov
Categories:
humorous, myth, mythology,
Tiresias
In Greece there once lived a great seer
named Tiresias. He had no peer
who could see quite as deep
while awake or a sleep.
So he purchased junk bonds every year.
Written by
M. L. Kiser
Categories:
cute, fun, funny, humorous, imagery, myth, mythology,
Bad Luck
Once a Leprechaun went swimming,
out in the deep blue sea.
Even though his head was spinning,
he thought it might appease.
He felt he needed exercise;
what’s better than a swim?
It’s healthy and fun, he surmised;
it beats a stuffy gym.
Without his trunks he felt so free;
waters warm from sunlight’s rays;
But in the distance, he could see;
his clothes blowing far away!
The lesson is simple; if you go swimming in the sea.
Have something on in case your clothes start riding on a breeze.
Written by
Elizabeth Smith
Categories:
allegory, beautiful, fantasy, humorous, mythology, sky, space,
A Smoking Gun
A SMOKING GUN
Beholding planet Earth from the far reaches of space,
In the ink black cosmos the observers must give voice
What a beautiful planet have we here
A very unusual blue and green glowing sphere
It must be the gateway to heaven's door
Let's go have a look -- what are we waiting for
If the visitors decide to land on this inviting earthly scene
They'd be met with guns and bullets before counting to 13
Written by
Volodymyr Knyr
Categories:
health, hero, humorous, hurt, men, mythology, people, work,
Achilles' Heels
There's no any Achilles' heels
that Hippocrates always heals.
Volodymyr Knyr
2014
Written by
Cheryl Hoffman
Categories:
humor, mythology,
Reason For Thor's Thunder
Being a norse god with a hugh appetite,
Thor devoured golden apples with delight,
gained too many pounds,
friction causing sound,
thunder erupting from his massive thighs.
11-3-16
Written by
Mike Martin
Categories:
hilarious, how i feel, humor, humorous, hurt, mythology, philosophy,
Miguel
he knows what they want
he always figures it out
miguel of the south
as the days went by
the masses grew in number
they tore down the walls
they flocked from the hills
and from the moors in the south
from the regal halls
they saw the whole thing
beheld the proclamation
the solemn promise
then he woke up
hardly a truck to be found
dang me, oh, dang me
Written by
Deborah Burch
Categories:
humorous, mythology,
Ogre
Ogre
Often he’s a cranky,
Olive-skinned, swamp dwelling,
Obtusely-witted fiend...
Only bathes in mud—eats
Onions, garlic, ...(sniff)... GAS?!!
Ogre’s in the outhouse!!
Oh! My giddy aunt...RUN!
©deborah burch
4.06.2021
Pleiades
Kim Merryman’s Pleiades O Poetry Contest
Written by
Ricky Smooth
Categories:
analogy, faith, god, growing up, humorous, mythology, religious,
A Godly Insight
"What if you woke up tomorrow with only
what you asked god for today?"
As I read, a scowl is freed, then a smile
indeed, and I'll tell you why - I say:
"Poseidon is not so beneficent,
And neither - I wager - is Zeus.
So it seems to me if a man is honest,
he wakes up with what HE has produced."
This much is true. But I jest, of course,
I know they mean well, but let's see...
If god is provider, I'll have some hot cider!
...And yet none is present for me.
"Now, now, be a gentleman. Don't let your
sharp tongue be like teeth." I think.
But if others' boats fill with water,
ought I not inform them they'll sink?
Written by
Jessica Amanda Salmonson
Categories:
funny, humor, mythology, philosophy, psychological, religious, silly,
The Minds of Mina and Eunice
Mi: Does God eat his boogers?
Eu: No of course God doesn't eat his boogers.
Mi: But I thought God could do anything.
Eu: Well he could eat his boogers but he just wouldn't.
Mi: So he does have boogers.
Eu: I don't know, I don't think God has boogers.
Mi: God can have anything he wants.
Eu: I don't think he wants boogers.
Mi: I don't think we can understand the mind of God.
Eu: We can't.
Mi: Maybe god is a booger.
Eu: God's not a booger.
Mi: But if God is all things, he's an all-knowing booger.
Eu: Stop it.
Mi: He's a wrathful all-knowing booger.
Eu: I'm not talking to you anymore.
Written by
Mike Martin
Categories:
humorous, mythology, philosophy, word play,
Olive Eo Munny
my needs and my name
are really one and the same
Olive Eo Munny
Written by
Linda Alice Fowler
Categories:
endurance, fun, history, humor, mythology, snow, winter,
Skadi
There once was a Norse goddess named Skadi
A Winter Ruler in huntress’ body
An expert at skiing
Her enemies fleeing
Ester Ledecka she did embody
Written by
M. L. Kiser
Categories:
animal, cute, fun, funny, myth, mythology, sleep,
Dragon Needs a C-Pap
Dragon
Snoring loud
Shook loose our walls
Rebuilding was costly
C-Pap!
Written by
Linda Alice Fowler
Categories:
addiction, humor, mythology,
Panther
Have you heard the Panther’s roar?
A sickly sweet odor.
He traps his prey in his paws,
devours them with beastly jaws.
Have you heard the Panther’s roar?
Three torpid days, he’ll snore.
Appetite he can’t sate.
Constant hunger is his fate.
Have you heard the Panther’s roar?
He requires so much more.
Dragon eludes him despite his feat.
He’ll never taste the other white meat.
Written by
Lukas Ficklin
Categories:
celebration, fun, happy, holiday, humor, light, mythology,
Where Did He Go
A treasure trove so we are told
atop a clover grove will behold
a green fortune you seek
when a leprechauns mystique
is your forgotten pot of gold
4/3/2017
Limerick contest
Written by
Jaymee Thomas
Categories:
appreciation, humor, image, spring,
La Primavera: a Footle On Love, Mythology, and Art
Footles, as one, regarding Spring by Sandro Botticelli
Sandro
Does Know:
Venus-
Genus
Darkened,
Starkened
West wind
Chlore sinned;
Shrewd glance,
Now dance
Bough, her
Flower;
Three Grace
At base
Bypass
Time sass,
Laurels
Morals
Orange grove,
Bee soave;
Broody-
Nudie
Looks left,
Bereft,
Cupid,
Stupid
As love
Above
High arts,
Babe farts
Passion's
Rations.
March 18, 2023
A Brian Strand Premiere No 1200 Poetry Contest
Sponsored by: Brian Strand
Written by
M. L. Kiser
Categories:
animal, dog, fantasy, funny, myth, mythology, pets,
Dragons Pets
Yet another dragon, we had to get
And he just had to have a pet.
For whatever reason, he chose a frog;
So we took him to a bog.
He cared for that frog,
as if it were A beloved dog.
My Great Aunt Mae, visited and
for 12 days, she stayed.
She volunteered, to dinner cook,
But, dragon’s frog, she mistook;
She served his legs with some she’d bought;
Leaving dragon quite distraught.
Apologizing, she said she’d pay; so, we adopted him
a dog that day; dragon was quickly appeased.
Written by
David Hyatt-Bickle
Categories:
god, humor, humorous, mythology, pride, vanity, voice,
The Abyss King
The proud ruler known vainly as Saklas
In the abyss proudly proclaimed with brass:
“I am god, no other but me!”
Then a voice above said in glee:
“You are completely wrong Saklas, you ***.”
Date: 09/06/2022
I counted the syllables myself