Humorous and funny Mean poems and/or funny poems about Mean. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Mean funny poems!
Written by
I Am Anaya
Categories:
humor, western,
One Mean Hombre
Harry Horsman; devilish rake, wild
Prodigy gunslinger as a child
Robs the stages then departs
Wields his way to women’s hearts
Smoked ‘em all down with joy as he smiled
Written by
Caren Krutsinger
Categories:
fun, funny, grandchild, grandmother, grandson, humor, humorous,
What Does Pulverize Mean
What does pulverize mean? The five-year-old asks me.
His face is a frown.
“No idea,” I lie.
Having already put up with sobbing wailing
over the Easter Bunny’s beheading
which was explained by his 11-year-old brother.
Brother who giggles and runs off.
No telling how he has used pulverize.
Written by
Shaina Rodriguez
Categories:
character, funny, humor, humorous, innocence, rude, silly,
I'M Not Mean
I am a very nice person
I'll tell you about my day
I'll sit and listen about yours
And hear what you have to say
I'll make sure you look very good
I'll tell you about your fly
Tell you when your crush is coming
Or tell you if he walks by
I come off very sarcastic
I do it to make you laugh
My sarcasm sounds kind of mean
It's funny on my behalf
Written by
Delores Allen
Categories:
child, food, fun, funny,
Why Are Parents So Mean
Why are parents so mean,
when I won't eat anything green?
No broccoli, brussels sprouts, green beans, or green grapes,
these will always stay on my plate.
So, here I sit watching the green things wrinkle,
while I cross my legs holding my tinkle.
I got to get up, stuff them in my mouth, and
while in the bathroom, barf them all out.
Parents can be so mean,
if you don't eat anything green.
Written by
Rico Leffanta
Categories:
appreciation, art, culture, england, funny, lust, sexy,
The Mean
Victorian art is quite clean
Though Roman and Greek are obscene
The Queen did not care
That David was bare
But he was quite shy of the mean!
Written by
Caren Krutsinger
Categories:
fun, funeral, funny, hilarious,
Pretty Dhramned Mean
My relatives came in droves to stare at my dead body.
And it ticked me off.
I flitted and fluttered and tried to signal them with a cough.
The only one who saw me was my little granddaughter Ashley.
Age two.
A baby who lived far away,
Who when I was alive I barely knew.
I thought it was strange they could come to my house now.
When I could no longer cuddle them or laugh or be seen
Just a dead body.
To stare at
I truly think this was pretty dhrammned mean.
Written by
Latisha Parkinson
Categories:
funny
Don'T You Mean....
eat more beans to stop constipation
with cornbread that won the food election
always keep going in the right direction
don't stare at girls because you'll get an ********
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WRITTEN FOR THE RSVP CONTEST.
IN RESPONSE TO -
Lawrence Ingle - My New Years Resolution {Inspired by Ms. Carrie}
Written by
James Horn
Categories:
humor, humorous,
Mean To Paula Dean
Mean to Paula Dean
Why should we be mean to Paula Dean
To us in America is the cooking queen,
Who used a word which was a no no
I had heard from Sunny Bono and Ono.
Just because it happened to be her,
To your big brain did it ever occur
She had been referring to a Brazil nut
Found in South America often in a hut.
So instead we need to go to Nigeria;
While there did catch a case of diphtheria,
But still that certain word will not use
Or I'll be accused of English abuse.
Colloquial, word has been called by some;
This is what you say when you are dumb;
I have never been known as a perfect saint;
Worst word I ever used was one called ain't.
jthorn5656@atmc.net
Written by
Jose Stephen
Categories:
business, confusion, children, funny, people,
What Do You Mean ?........
Ring ....Ring.......Ring.......Ring
Hello ! who is this ?
May I speak with shing hong ?
Who ?.........
Shing hong ......
No. I think it is wrong number
Ha ha ha ha ...........
Ha ha ha ha ...........
What do you mean wrong number ?...
You know what I mean .........
Not really .........
Spent time and think
Ha ha ha ha ha ha......
Ha ha ha ha ha ha......
Ok... Can you give me his number then ?
No I don't have it......
What do mean you don't have it ?.....
You know what I mean ........
Not really .......... ha ha ha ha ha
Ha ha ha ha ha ..... stop it, ok ?......
Ha ha ha ha ha.... I am sorry ...ha ha ha ha ha
It is ok....ha ha ha ha ha .............Clinnnggg.....
Written by
Deb M
Categories:
humor, mystery, rude,
The Mean Gene
“The mean gene”
The act of treating all living creatures like sh*t
Is it a learnt behaviour
Or ….. are you born with it?
Written by
Joyce Johnson
Categories:
funny
Word Morph--Mean To Good
Jake the jokester was so mean
He liked to make his sister moan,
Until one night beneath the moon
Jake was beguiled to better mood.
He now finds joy in being good.
Written by
Rudolph Rinaldi
Categories:
children, funny, growing up, life,
What Does It All Mean
MAMA
WHAT DOES IT ALL MEAN
YOU’LL FIND OUT
WHEN YOU GET OLD
BUT LITTLE ONE
DON’T TELL ANYONE
OR YOU’LL RUIN IT
FOR EVERYONE
JUST TELL THEM
THAT THEY’LL FIND OUT
WHEN THEY GET OLD
AND NOT TO TELL NO ONE
Written by
Pat Adams
Categories:
animal, conflict, humor,
Some Elephants Are Just Mean
Wet from my shower with no chance to groom
I addressed the elephant in the room
Why so long a trunk
He said like your junk
It just can't be any shorter I assume
I tried to soften, the bite of his critique
By attempting to turn the other cheek
Like my cat rose
I booped his nose
He knocked me into the middle of next week!
Written by
Judge Santiago Burdon
Categories:
humorous, magic,
She Threw a Mean Tarot
Persuaded by a gypsy imposter to have my Tarot read
There were two cards missing from her Tarot deck
She hadn't figured out which ones yet
Didn't seem to be important
Mentioning it was all bull anyway
Although there was one event in my future
she was sure of
I was still going to have to pay.
Written by
Mike Martin
Categories:
hilarious, holiday, humor, i love you, imagination, inspirational, irony,
Laura Mean
Laura mean - a brute my queen
Especially on her wash machine
Scarce moved in and three are gone
Will this one last who knows how long
You wonder why I stay in line
Yet even after all this time
Dump my pockets flip my shorts out
Hang me inside out to dry
Written by
A Yorkshire Poet
Categories:
humor,
Mean Opponent
He stood there looking at me.
I knew his eyes were fixed.
Slowly approaching me, I didn't feel ready to see his tricks.
He was somewhat angry, I could tell by his growl and stare.
We were matched in size but he had something else in his look, like he had passed the point of care.
I decided to back off slowly.
Considered steps I took.
Not taking his eyes off me
He watched the path I took.
At safe distance I slowly turned and heard him call my name.
This cat fight was not worth it, his intent was to kill should we clash and fight.
That is one mean, tough tomcat and I don't need this stress tonight.
Written by
Caren Krutsinger
Categories:
hilarious, humor, humorous, husband, wife,
I Am Hal I Mean Dick
Hal is a catfisher.
He has had lots of dates this month.
He cannot believe how fast women are these days.
They practically tear your pants off.
He poses as Dick, a bachelor.
Says he is an artist and a composer.
Today’s lunch date is late.
She shows up and he is startled.
It is his wife.
She had used a different photo.
Said her name was Ivy.
You are a Dick! She says to him.
Let’s pretend we aren’t married he says.
Best conversation they have had in three years.
He hopes she will be fast like the others.
She isn’t.