Humorous and funny First Love poems and/or funny poems about First Love. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious First Love funny poems!
Written by
Daniel Turner
Categories:
funny love,
If I Were the One For Nicola
If only I could make my way to Paris
To search the boulevards and rainy rues
I'd look to find my lonely heart an heiress
An Irish lass vacationing her muse
We'd find a quiet cafe' on the Seine
Where we could sit and share a laugh or two
By candlelight we'd toast with French champagne
Pretend that we were on our honeymoon
But how could I convince her I'm the one
To make all of her fantasies come true
She knows there's more to life than having fun
In Paris hearts get easily confused
I'd get down on one knee under the stars
Give her the paper ring off my cigar
an original poem by Daniel Turner
Written by
Daniel Turner
Categories:
funny, love, sad,
How Long
I've never kissed a pig with my eyes closed
Nor have I ever held a hand of time
However, there was once when I proposed
But that was back when I was in my prime
I still recall how much she loved to dance
She'd laugh at me and make my face turn red
She taught me all the secrets of romance
That love was what one did, not what one said
I search the shadows for her purple hue
I take her mem'ry everywhere I go
Its smile has it's own special shade of blue
Its taste so sweet no one could ever know
They tell me only time mends broken hearts
I wonder just how long before it starts.
by Daniel Turner
Written by
Maureen McGreavy The Insolent Rib
Categories:
funny love, woman,
Disarming Disarray
Out there
With her flair for chasing inspiration
She draws you in her reason
Connecting dots and constellations
Tripping
She takes you by the hand
Her world as messy as her mind
You need a guide
And as you wade through her chaff
Her heaps of half thoughts
Her every whim expressed
The only thing you know for sure is
Out there exists
Date: 11.19.2019
Contest Name: Disarray
Sponsor: Nina Parmenter
Written by
Joyce Johnson
Categories:
humor, love,
Knowin How To Keep Em
Oh don't think that I ain't seein'
As you roll those purty eyes,'
And my man stands there a gawkin'
Like he'd won some sort of prize.
My ma taught me how to keep em
And to cut you down to size.
For there ain't no man worth havin'
Can resist my apple pies.
Written by
Michelle Faulkner
Categories:
funny love, silly,
Heartache's Milkshakes
On this merry-go-round
Of breakups and breakdowns
Singing the blues
In our ding-a-ling shoes
We take our heartache's milkshakes
Spiked with itty-bitty pity
Before we tangle and wrangle
In the rebound playground.
4/16/20
Poem of the Day
April 18, 2020
Written by
Jslambert Mister Roboto
Categories:
allegory, fantasy, father, funny, girlfriend-boyfriend, happiness, health, hope, husband, imagination, life, love, passion, people, places, romance, social, wife,
Viagra Falls
There once was a man from Niagara
whose wiener's so long it would stab ya'
but when it got little
his pills became skittles
until he O.D.'d on Viagra
© ~JSLambert 2011*****A classic "stiff" competitor, standing "firm" amongst other "members" in the "thick" of the competition:) hope everyone gets "a rise" out of it!
Written by
Daniel Turner
Categories:
crush, funny love, humorous, teacher,
Teacher's Pet
As I look back, it all seems funny now
Recalling all those awkward teen age years
I pushed the limits farther than allowed
Supposedly when young, we had no fears
Infatuation caught me with the blues
My heart was swollen by love's gentle sting
It was a crush that only left a bruise
Left by the diamond in her wedding ring
The first day I laid eyes on her, I fell
The lightning bolt she was, that shook my world
And to this day I swear I'd know her smell
Could she have read my mind, she'd likely hurled
I hated school but never missed her class
She said she loved me 'cause I made her laugh
original poem by Daniel Turner
Written by
A.O. Taner
Categories:
august, beach, beautiful, cool, crush, deep, destiny, devotion, fantasy, feelings, first love, fishing, freedom, funny love, future, girlfriend, hope, i love you, i miss you, journey, joy, judgement, lost love, love, love hurts, meaningful, miracle, ocean, people, places, romance, sea, sensual, simple, spiritual, water, women, world,
Hope
Don't rush to wash off the sea salt
drying on your skin;
the hopes it carries from other oceans,
those remain yet to be seen.
Written by
Mary Nagy
Categories:
angst, daughter, family, funny, happiness, life, love, car,
Princess Needs a New Car
Princess just wants a new car.
I have told her that hers will go far.
'Oh, it's really not cool
driving this crap to school.'
'Do I need that emotional scar? '
'The kids will all laugh at the rust.
When we race, I'll be left in the dust!
I will save up some cash
then we'll make a mad dash
to the car dealer surely you trust'.
'He will make us a wonderful deal
and I'm sure you will know how I feel.
I will love you so much,
My siblings... I won't touch.
Just get me behind a new wheel'!
Now she'll be cruisin in style.
She'll be happy for only awhile.
There will always be better
and we'll try hard to get her
a car that will make princess smile.
Written by
Celeste Butler-Mendez
Categories:
funny, love
Black Magic Hearts
What underhanded monkey business
razzle-dazzle bull is this?
Whose double-crossing, flimflam scam,
debauchery or hocus sham
is wheeling dealing in romance,
putting lovers in a trance?
Antics, capers or witch's brew,
enchanting hymns or shaman's stew,
whose quackery or voodoo drink
made Casanova stop and think
and turned the ancient lovers cold;
poor Romeo and nymphs of old?
Perhaps black magic's potent gel,
or craftiness or wicked spell,
a clever con or master hoax,
or just some trickster playing jokes.
Whatever ruse that works the arts,
mumbo jumbo seduces hearts!
Written by
Dan Kearley
Categories:
funny, inspirational, love,
A Gentle Kiss
A gentle kiss,
that I really must send
To another true,
and very dear friend
Pucker up babe,
it's coming your way
And riding a storm,
so it should be there today
I licked my lips before I blew,
so I know it's going to stick
But with all the lightning,
it might have a little kick
So when it hits your lips,
it might give off a little spark
Now what started off as a gentle kiss,
might be leaving you in the dark
*For my sweety*
*Elizabeth Wesley*
Love,Dannyboy
8-24-12
Written by
Jan Allison
Categories:
humorous,
Love Is Bind
poor puppet dances
to the tune of her master -
he’s pulling her strings!
Jan Allison
9th April 2015
Contest: - Judy Konos Get Your Senryu On
~awarded 1st place~
Written by
Jan Allison
Categories:
humorous, love,
I Love To Hate You
Just one look at you
Tempting me, teasing me, tormenting me
I hate the feelings you evoke
Greed
Desire
Lust
Just want to hold you, devour you
I don’t want to see you go
But I can never resist the last chocolate in the box!
9th March 2015
Contest – Love or Hate – Pick a subject - Shadow Hamilton
I chose Love as my theme
~awarded 1st place~
Written by
Arthur Vaso
Categories:
fantasy, fun, funny, holiday, humorous, love,
I Want Peace
I want a piece of chocolate cake
Oh and a delicious piece of cherry pie
I want a piece of that place called Fort Knox
With all those pieces I could afford a lot
I want a piece of that lady over there
In her haute couture she saunters with such flair
I want a piece of the clouds in the sky
I just want it, don't ask me why!
I want some tiny peace of mind
To have some pieces left to be kind
Then I can give you a piece of Art
A piece I promise comes straight from the heart
Written by
Robert Ronnow
Categories:
bird, humor, insect, love, men, poetry, wine,
Can Poetry Matter
In the debate between accessible and difficult poems
Poets' poems and poems for people
Only the single poem and private reader matter
Both kinds and anything between can matter or not
Solid or made of air, a vase or heavy clay ashtray
One word repeated or many like a lei
An acquired taste, like wine, and like wine
Not sustenance, yet men die with their miseries
Uncut without it, news and mere matter
I advise everyone to keep a personal anthology of poems that matter
Or not. Perhaps it should be novels. Stones, insect wings,
Feathers, Birds you've seen, People loved.
Written by
Moonbee Canady
Categories:
daughter, family, funny, happiness, life, love, mother, nature, nostalgia, peace, people, seasons
Its Raining...
Its Raining…
God’s Cleansing Tool
Cloud-Concerto… How Cool !
Plop-Plop Plopping into Pothole Pools
On the Grass, Pavements and On My Own-Sweet- Fools…
who, don’t have Sense enough, to get out of the Rain…
… I think I’ll go Join Them… Again
Amen
Written by
Richard Lamoureux
Categories:
beauty, fun, giggle, inspiration, love, stars,
Fountain
I want to eat Pizza
While wishing on a star
To taste the taste of happy
By being where you are
We’ll choose to be silly
Not afraid of mistakes
Skinny dip at midnight
and skip pebbles on lakes
Why not dance together
While howling at the moon
Or become little children
and watch a cartoon
A world infused with laughter
can change how we think
From this fountain of youth
We’ll both gladly drink
For nothing could be better
Than sharing it with you
Because getting into mischief
Is a blast if there are two!
Written by
Anya Chebukina
Categories:
funny, love,
Basements Basements
This is just for fun..=)
In the basement of my heart
there is a basement
and in that basement there are two basements.
You open one
and enter the basement
only to find out there is yet another basement
That basements basement
was light and blue
But that basements basement
was black
from basement to basement you walked
until you couldn't anymore
The basements basements
basements basements basements
basements basements basements basement
of my heart.
You found my love...
Written by
Maureen McGreavy The Insolent Rib
Categories:
butterfly, funny love,
Blushing Butterflies
Butterflies have the quietest wings
Defying the weight of their flutterings
Your red face has shown
What you did not want known
Your fight to keep them from escaping
10.02.2019
Writing Challenge, October - Butterfly -
Sponsor, Dear heart - Wiishkobi Ode
Written by
Francis J Grasso
Categories:
fun, humorous, love,
Love Me
Leave me alone you beautified 6itch ;
Oh ghastly and ghoulish playpen of a witch.
Vases of roses are covering your deeds;
Eloquent verses describe your sick needs.
Many come calling but none ever leave;
Even my dumb heart now wants a reprieve.
written 04.02.2016
Written by
Paula Goldsmith
Categories:
hate, humor, love, relationship, today, together, uplifting,
Today
Today,
I love you.
Today,
I hate you.
This week,
I love you,
This week,
I hate you.
Can this go on,
it has for years.
This love hate relationship,
is now over.
I am kicking you to the curb,
to the trash can you must go.
Did you figure me out,
I am your bathroom scale.
Hooray~you are gone.
Written by
Skat A
Categories:
adventure, brother, fantasy, funny, funny love, giggle, girlfriend,
Monkey See
Monkey See~
There once was a monkey named Frank
Who loved to walk the plank
He said too many jokes
Pulled too many hoaxe-s
Ha! Ha! Ha! Then he got a good spank
*
Who's that monkey in front of me
I dare to hang with you on a tree
Oh! What I do? Will you do?
Together we are like glue
Is that my flea or your flea?
~ Skat ~
Contest~
Written by
Sharon De Fazio
Categories:
cute love, funny love, i miss you, joy, love, simile, teen,
I Miss You
I miss you,
like the sky misses the stars.
like the streets when there are no cars.
like a government that has no laws,
like music, when it is on pause.
I miss you,
like the desert misses the rain
like an addict without cocaine,
like a kiss that misses lips
like actors without their scripts.
Written by
Anne-Lise Andresen
Categories:
giggle, holiday, love,
- Rio De Janeiro and Carl -
Carl is still in Rio
He is hooked on the casino
Sweet love in moonlight
Cherry musk all night
His libido is like a volcano
01.03.2018
Sun :) - A-L Andresen :)
6-8-5 -5 -10 syllables
www.howmanysyllables.com
Written by
Brenda Meier-Hans
Categories:
happy, humorous, love, silly,
Welcome To My Bio
Brenda Gail
I am Compassionate, love and breathe poetry, humorous and a peace maker.
Sister of Patti Lynne, Paul, David and Beth.
I love children (more), I love to sing in a choir and have a song for just about everything. I love to make others happy.
I feel loved, appreciated and very blessed.
I fear not being healthy enough to make it to my son’s wedding, getting sick this winter and losing my mom.
I’d love to be able to travel again, walk around a mall, and would love to be in a poetry slam.
Living in the GTA Greater Toronto Area, Ontario.
Meier-Hans
Written by Brenda Meier-Hans
10.13.2014
Regina Riddles Contest: Bio Poems
1st