Funny Poems About Lost Love or Lost Love Funny Poems

Humorous and funny Lost Love poems and/or funny poems about Lost Love. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Lost Love funny poems!

Written by A.O. Taner
Categories: august, beach, beautiful, cool, crush, deep, destiny, devotion, fantasy, feelings, first love, fishing, freedom, funny love, future, girlfriend, hope, i love you, i miss you, journey, joy, judgement, lost love, love, love hurts, meaningful, miracle, ocean, people, places, romance, sea, sensual, simple, spiritual, water, women, world,

Hope

Don't rush to wash off the sea salt 
drying on your skin;
the hopes it carries from other oceans,
those remain yet to be seen.

Written by Flippant She-Creature
Categories: funny, girlfriend-boyfriend, happiness, health, lost love, love, mother, parody, romance, satire, sorry,

Shall I Compare Thee To Your Mother's ****

Shall I compare thee to your mother's ****?
Thou aren’t more lovely, but more flatulent.
Rough winds do shake it; and bring on a farce
And all her clothes hath all too short a rent

Sometime too hot-headed of hell doth burn,
And often is the true nature exposed;
And every foul from fowl; my stomach churns,
By reason, or by nature's raging closed.

But thy infernal diet shall ne’er start
Nor gain possession of which now I grasp;
Nor shall we meet again; let’s stay apart,
When in eternal sounds the voice does rasp,
So long as men can breathe or eyes can cry,
So long lives this, and I bid thee goodbye.


Written by Niketa Mckenzie
Categories: funny, lost love, love,

One Night Stand

Their once was a girl in love
She knew he was sent from above
They danced, they sing they did everthing
But then he deflated in the tub

Written by A.O. Taner
Categories: beautiful, beauty, courage, cute love, dark, deep, depression, desire, destiny, devotion, dream, first love, funny love, grief, happiness, heart, heartbreak, heartbroken, how i feel, i am, i love you, i miss you, innocence, irony, jealousy, lonely, longing, loss, lost, love, love hurts, miss you, missing, missing you, night, passion, psychological, romance, romantic, sad, sad love, silence, sky, sleep, solitude, sunset, true love,

Red Light

have you ever felt like 
the flashing red light on the roof,
lonely as ever
visible at night, useless by day?

in sync with its partner next door
for a quick kiss over a few flashes only 
then arguing again and again 
night in, night out.

have you ever felt like 
the flashing red light on the roof,
not signaling a warning to keep away
but sending a call for compassion?

using the dark pauses in between 
to yell the same name 
over and over and over
into the emptiness of each night.

have you ever felt like
the flashing red light on the roof,
being your silent cry
only heard by your eternal love?

Written by Mark Pringle
Categories: allegory, funny, lost love, heart, heart,

Once Upon a Happenstance

Once upon a happenstance
I gazed, a look, and paused in trance

To dream upon a crystal palace
Her heart aglee and form to chalice

With towers true and field in view
I set a course to give tongue to

I crossed the field - anxiety smote
And walked upon this palace mote

Yet, as I firmed, my heart to pour
She drew the bridge and bolted door


Written by Mary Rotman
Categories: betrayal, conflict, funny, heartbreak, hurt, lost love, metaphor,

Nuclear-Free Zone

You should know that I've
reinforced the bunker
I built around my heart
until it can withstand a
     direct hit
     ground zero
     head-on collision
from a YOU-bomb.

I've shielded it to withstand
the worst Emotional Mutilation Potential
you can generate
and to protect me from
the flash burns of passion, 
Not to mention that I've lined it with lead
to save me from the fallout
of your so-called love.

So-
hit me with your worst.
My bunker--and I-- are ready.

Written by Katherine Braithwaite
Categories: humorous, lost love, lust,

Yet Another Lover

When yet another lover flees my cat sized bed
and leaves me wild and comely in the night
I wonder if it's unknown words I've read
Or is it that my eyes have taken flight?

I tempt the sin with all my female parts.
They feel I'm like a spider with a bat,
to cure ,devour,digest my ghoulish pests,
They think they should be learning on the sat.

But some who mind me feel they have been robbed.
I give them all detention,I'm a liar.
I give them generous fare and sing sheeps' songs.
I give them comfort like a hellish fire

Oh,come back ,bad boy ,don't desert me yet,
The clothes I thrashed for you are not quite set.

Written by Whit Deschner
Categories: 12th grade, absence, funny, heartbroken, humorous, lost love, love,

Untidled

Caught in emotion
She went down to the ocean
To where the cliffs are extremely steep
And there she wept
Then finally lept
At a place called 'Lover's Leap'

But while doing here pouting
The tide took to outing
And now the tour guides to show
Where lost love and gravity
Made a large cavity
Far far on the beach below

Written by Jslambert Mister Roboto
Categories: funny, happiness, lost love, passion, people, romance, i love you,

My Sweet Camel Toe, Where'D You Go

Where'd you go?
oh where did you go
my precious camel toe?

played me like a fiddle
with your bubbly middle
you're such a skanky hoe
but I love you so
camel toe
camel toe

we had magic
we had fire
purple sweatpants my desire
come back camel toe

victory! camel toe
you're the villain 
you're the winner
with your puffy 
wedgied center

camel toe
camel toe

you're my sassy hoe
you're my Christmas snow
gone like cold wind blows
with your return
my member grows

I miss my camel toe
baby 
where'd you go?
sweaty sweetie 
camel toe

Written by Anthony Scandrick Ii
Categories: anniversary, baby, beautiful, beauty, caregiving, child, childhood, confusion, courage, dark, dedication, depression, devotion, freedom, goodbye, graduation, growing up, happiness, hope, humorous, lonely, lost love, love, mystery, passion, satire, slam, sorrow, sorry, success, suicide, teen, thank you, uplifting, write,

Dear Michelle

You almost had me,
I wanted you,
The way you stuck to me like super glue,
I was feeling you,
But I knew,
I could never have you,
But, the way you looked at me,
The way my body pleads,
We can never be,
Because I’m too old,
And your only thirteen.

Written by Dan Keir
Categories: allah, angel, angst, confusion, dream, education, faith, freedom, god, happiness, health, heaven, history, holocaust, hope, humorous, imagination, inspirational, introspection, jesus, journey, life, lonely, loss, lost, lost love, miracle, nature, on writing and words, pain, peace, people, philosophy, political, prayer, recovery from..., religious, sad, spiritual, stress, success, sympathy, teacher, time, write,

Haikus About God: Iii

Beauty of nature
Why condense it down to God?
Isn’t life enough?

Written by Cona Adams
Categories: animal, emotions, humorous, hyperbole, lost love, lust,

Of Lust and Dissipation

A Spenserian Sonnet
(Mr. Snake falls in love with a garden hose)

Today I slithered up a grassy hill,
wet from the creek and eager to explore.
The urge to snare a mate devoured my will,
could not this be the day for me to score?

I spot you there beside the garden door, 
your slick green shape pervades my hungry sight.
Your golden head criss-cross my eyes before
your trim tight coil peals visions of delight.

Yet when I push my moves into the light
your body squirms and grows before my eyes,
and dread arises in a burst of fright.
You spit at me in angry spurts, surprise

me with a gush of clear and liquid spray,
while I make haste to scuttle fast away.

Written by Dan Keir
Categories: allah, angel, angst, courage, dream, education, faith, fantasy, fear, funny, god, heaven, history, hope, humorous, imagination, inspirational, introspection, jesus, journey, life, lonely, loss, lost, lost love, love, miracle, mystery, nostalgia, on work and working, parody, passion, peace, people, philosophy, political, prayer, recovery from..., religion, religious, spiritual, stress, success, sympathy, teacher, time, write,

Haikus About God: V

Omniscient guy
Yet he lets bad things happen
How can he exist?

Written by A.O. Taner
Categories: beautiful, change, cheer up, confidence, cool, courage, cute love, deep, destiny, emotions, environment, fantasy, fear, feelings, first love, for her, funny love, happiness, happy, how i feel, humanity, hyperbole, i am, i love you, inspiration, journey, joy, life, lost love, love, love hurts, miss you, missing, missing you, ocean, paradise, philosophy, pride, romance, romantic, senses, smile, spring, sunshine, travel, uplifting, wind,

Rainbow

imagine the rainbow being
the dark tunnel 
you've been stuck in for years

the lighthouse on the horizon,
the beam 
that gets brighter as it nears

get soaked in the rain,
feel the sun in your heart,
let go of all your fears.

Written by Rudolph Rinaldi
Categories: dream, funny, hair, life, lost, love, peace,

Where Has It Gone

we had hair 
in the 1960s
where has it gone
we had
love and peace

Written by Maggie Dickerson
Categories: adventure, animals, funny, imagination, inspirational, lost love, pets, war,

Llama

Nothing rhymes with llama
Nothing rhymes with lava
HEY! Llama and lava rhyme
I guess I knew that the whole time
When I see a llama, I shout
But when I see it not burning in lava, I pout
Ok, so that's not true
But I'm sitting here quietly with nothing to do......
I just realized that I've never seen a llama in the zoo.
I'm really starting to hate llamas now
I really wish they would all burn in lava
Still not true....
Still with nothing better to do...

Written by Dan Keir
Categories: adventure, angst, autumn, business, confusion, dark, dedication, depression, fear, grief, growing up, happiness, happy, hate, health, home, hope, humorous, imagination, inspirational, introspection, journey, life, lonely, loss, lost, love, on work and working, pain, parody, people, relationship, retirement, sad, satire, school, social, stress, success, sympathy, time, work,

Reflections: Midlife Crisis

P     aranoia permeates, etching itself into your fractured face,
A     cacophony of constant pressure; life remains a stressful race,
N     othing to hope for, no positives like promotion in the workplace,
I      nability to love, relationships lift anchor and set sail without chase,
C     hildren crushing dreams under mortgages; age grows with disgrace
!!

Written by John Trusty
Categories: funny, lost love, nature

Head(S) Or Tail(S)

summers’ last prayer

you’re about to lose your head…

while getting some tail


*For the Praying Mantis Haiku Contest

Written by Deborah Burch
Categories: history, humorous, lost love,

Scarlett's Lament

Scarlett's Lament

Fiddlede-diddlede
Scarlett O'Hara, she
slew all the fellas--not
lifting a hand
'Cepting Rhett Butler proved
Incomprehensible
with, "Frankly, my dear, I
don't give a damn!"

©deborah burch
1.30.2013

Written by Anthony Scandrick Ii
Categories: angel, beautiful, beauty, caregiving, childhood, confusion, courage, dark, daughter, death, dedication, depression, devotion, dream, faith, fear, forgiveness, freedom, friendship, girlfriend, grief, happiness, hate, heaven, hope, humorous, imagination, life, lonely, loss, lost, lost love, love, miracle, passion, peace, relationship, romance, romantic, sorrow, sorry, stress, sympathy, uplifting, heart, hate, hate, heart,

Never Take Hate Outside

When you're hurt inside,
And there's no where to hide,
And there's no one on your side,
And it's killing your pride,
Inside,
Never take hate outside,

When your heart is chocking,
The heavy words never spoken,
The things that hurt you inside,
When love has died,
Inside,
Never take hate outside,

When your heart is gone,
From being alone,
And it beats a solemn tone,

When you're cold inside,
It's only a short ride,
Never take hate outside

Written by A.O. Taner
Categories: betrayal, boat, change, computer, confusion, cool, crazy, cute love, emotions, fantasy, funny, funny love, heart, heartbroken, hello, irony, light, loneliness, lonely, lost love, love, love hurts, parody, relationship, river, romantic, sad love, satire, soulmate, voyage, wisdom,

Boat

I had my heart put on auto-pilot,
set to navigate towards you; 

the low-battery signal just came on,
I don't know what to do.

Written by Sam Ruby
Categories: angst, art, beautiful, beauty, boyfriend, butterfly, caregiving, childhood, computer-internet, confusion, courage, cowboy-western, dance, dark, daughter, dedication, depression, devotion, dream, funny, girl, girlfriend, goodbye, growing up, happiness, humorous, inspirational, lost, lost love, nostalgia, peace, romance, romantic, sad, song, teen, time, uplifting, women, me, love, me,

Pricked

Your  love pricks me like a rose each thorn grows but no one knows Your so full of 
it as it shows so carry on now go on, go. I'm fed up with the phony and  i'm 
through with the tears, you couldn't pay me all your money to make up for those 
years. Someone help me I feel faint how could I think he was such a saint and 
worst of all I let me fall into a spiral down below. A magic called love carried 
by the dove of someone I use to know.

Written by Jessica Durham
Categories: funny, life, lost love, love, teen, love,

"a Trip Down Memory Lane"

Coors Lite, Food Fight,
My bros dirt bike, and kisses good night,
Orangutan Sex, "I give it a ten"
Billy Bob and Bacon, his little pig friend.
In the dark playin' basketball,
Don't forget about Niagra Falls.
What kind of hips do you want?
It seems we can't agree,
Candy Shop, PDA, A BIG mouthful of me.
Varsity Blues, The "I Love You's"
Makin' Cookies that look like pancakes,
But all of these things just lead to a heartbreak.


This poem is for Terry Bell!
He was my first "true love".
We aren't together now,
But I still Love him.
Let's face it...
I ALWAYS will!

Written by Marlowe Sr.
Categories: anger, emotions, funny love, lost love, love, love hurts,

Asking Her Out

I asked. She said No. Talked to her on Facebook, She said No. Shook hands with her buddies, Befriended her mamma, But from her it was still a No. She grumbled, And said No. She thanked me for the bouquet, But still said No. Called her day and night Mailed her every fortnight, But from her it was still a big No. Then she writes back to apologize, But it is still a No! Ah well, I should have gotten the message, That was loud and clear, When Michelle had said No!

Written by A.O. Taner
Categories: absence, break up, confidence, death, feelings, funny, i am, i love you, inspirational, leaving, loneliness, lost love, love, moving on, psychological, recovery from, relationship, suicide, true love, wife,

End

Only then you're done,
when you end the ending;
leave the closure to others,
that way it's much more fun.