Humorous and funny Language poems and/or funny poems about Language. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Language funny poems! Also, try our sister website's powerful search engine for poems or see our other Language Poems.
Poem Details | by
Gary Smith |
Categories:
bird, humorous, language, pets,
My parrots name was Captain Flint,
Boy that bird could swear.
I never invited visitors,
So blue was the air.
He'd squawk "pretty effing polly"
Or "give us a cracker you t##t"
I'd never heard such swearing,
I never taught him that.
I bought him off a sailor
Who was heading back to sea,
He said to me, "you'll love him
He's such good company."
And what he said was right
He entertained, it's true.
I said "who's a pretty boy then"
He squawked, " well not effing you !"
The profanities just got too much,
I sold him, with regret.
But the house seems so quiet now,
Without my 'effing' pet !
Poem Details | by
Mike Gentile |
Categories:
fun, humor, language,
I’m thinking of the letter “B”
So close and yet so far
It seems a bit unfair to me
Let’s stop, reset the bar
We’ve cast the “B” to status, poor
With quality less pleasing
Like something from a discount store
A lack of something, teasing
Yet think of how essential,
I’m sure you will agree
Just think how consequential,
Not having a plan B
It also fronts some of the Best
And Brightest of our text
So much more, I’ve not addressed
But look what’s coming next!
Perhaps this is somewhat a stretch
But imagine Hamlet’s bray
With the words he’d have to retch,
To “A” or not to “A”
Poem Details | by
Hgarvey Daniel Esquire |
Categories:
funny, imagination, people, people,
I failed English in High School
Could not understand the writing rule
If I say, when it reigns it pores, people agree
Yet when I write the same phrase people say what’s wrong with me
I before E (accept) after C less it sounds like an a as in neighbor or weigh
Where do the words foreign and sovereign (steigh)
Do they stay with a goose among geese or with a moose among (meese)
Do they live in a house with a scavenger mouse or something much bigger
Is there several (hice) with several scavenger mice
Poem Details | by
Jan Allison |
Categories:
humorous, language,
Young Willy arranged to go camping
alas, he struggled erecting his tent
he tweeted he had terrible ******** problems
I hope his parents knew what he meant!
Next year he said he’ll go glamping
or hire a log cabin out in the wood
then he won’t have ******** difficulties
and his tweets can’t be misunderstood!
8/1/18
Poem Details | by
Pat Adams |
Categories:
character, education, humorous, language, perspective,
You might take this with a grain of salt
Knowing I heard it on the grape vine
Why they let the cat out of the bag
I'd say your guess is as good as mine
They say I tend to sit on the fence,
Off my rocker by not a far cry
That I'm not playing with a full deck
They should let those sleeping dogs lie!
Because there's method to my madness,
And I'm to blame if things go south
So I'm not beating around the bush
You heard it straight from the horses mouth!
Poem Details | by
Mary Rotman |
Categories:
humor, language, parody, word play,
A poem in honor of my blog. Have fun, everybody! Place tongue firmly in cheek.
They'res a buoy at the window
Smiling inn at me
But eye don't really no hymn
Wait—he's Nettie's boy, that's he!
He's got a creepy effect
And wholes all in his genes
His pants are held up by a chord
A very pore lad he seams.
Ewe be witness to this boy
A buoy who has no wright
To bee laying their upon my sill
A disgraceful aweful site.
Sew Nettie, you come get hymn
And take him back to home
The afternoon is a-waisting
So come and get him, come.
Poem Details | by
Rico Leffanta |
Categories:
america, confusion, funny, history, language, spoken word, woman,
An ancestor known as, "Miss Lottie"
Was a New York socialite "hottie"
To her lasting disgrace
She slapped Paul Revere's face
When he invited her to the p-ah-ty
Poem Details | by
David Sollis |
Categories:
class, culture, humorous, language, silly,
In Oxford and Cambridge, they can get jolly batey
‘cos they don’t speak proper wot like I do matey
Poem Details | by
Arthur Vaso |
Categories:
humanity, humorous, language,
I lost my spelling and grandma checker
I am an idea roving iround inside on me heade
The lanquagees of today our so misread
why if y go back some yeers in the hundrads
the language was all different , aint that a bummer?
All the errors of times leng ago
the all surmounted to the rooles of now for shoow
we evlove wes do, of this I am sore
I love words even from distance shores
grandma would shoot me, make their be it kno doubt
Dis poem was written by a grammerless lout
Note: Posted a Blog on the same topic!!!
Poem Details | by
Volodymyr Knyr |
Categories:
animal, bird, kids, humorous, language, spoken word,
All Porto geese
speak Portuguese.
Volodymyr Knyr
2014
Poem Details | by
Julian Bohan |
Categories:
angel, angst, art, bible, boyfriend, eve, god, humor, language, nature, nice, retirement, science, senses, silly, snow,
RIPAE BENI DEAU VER
In modus fasciculumque Brady pus.
Rogationes, confractum egemus.
Minara excommunica
Ripa nostra, sus amica,
Sic superbum precum, pape beatus.
Story:
http://www.sloveniatimes.com/president-to-attend-pope-francis-s-installation-mass#komentarji
The National Poet Of Slovenia In A Language People Understand moves in mysterious ways. Just ignore him.
www.jesus.si
Poem Details | by
John Williams |
Categories:
humorous,
A Chinese man who rolled his rrrs
Went into a shop to buy cigars,
He said, "Ri'll rav Renry Rinterman's rover rhere.
The grinning owner said, "Your English is bare,
But give me rifty rollars, here's your rox of rigars."
Poem Details | by
Wallace Kaufman |
Categories:
animal, beauty, humor, language, onomatopoeia, senses, word play,
Where this time?
The pair makes several tries--
my hard hat, a can of nails, window ledge
all filled with leaves.
How do they judge
those inferior, this one prime?
It's predetermined,
I don't know how.
So too their songs--
he two-notes or three-notes,
and she chirrrs along.
Same songs, same positions,
morning in and morning out.
I wake to their repetition.
If they watch me, no doubt
they'd see my own routines,
but neither they nor I can find
what isn't wired in my genes.
Why does this human mind
hear Figaro, Figaro, Figaro
in his operatic voice?
Or is it video, video, video?
It's his song, but my choice.
Poem Details | by
Volodymyr Knyr |
Categories:
body, humorous, language, spoken word, words,
Close-clenched lips
stop tongues' slips.
Volodymyr Knyr
2014
Poem Details | by
Michael Whatley |
Categories:
confusion, funny, language, satire, school, writing,
Rote an esay
Cheked IT twise
Lot's a' mistakes
Graide not so nice...
I yused comas
Perfetley placed paws
"2 much incoheeseivenes"
I cant, brake up a, claws
Yused fulstops.
not tolong a .sentense
But teecher. was furryous
Marked down with a venjance
Did exclamashons!
Sumtimes .3 @ once!!!!
& YUSED CAPS 2 SHOUT!!
Butt "you ownly need one,!!"
Coalon,
Wen I need 2 maik: lists
Rote my: Faverit, tv shos
But: teecher were: p*ssed
Semicoalons;
Wen, I need 2 look: smart!!
nut shure wat. they do; But
the esay ritings really hard!!!
[93 werds]
Poem Details | by
Hgarvey Daniel Esquire |
Categories:
funny, imagination, love,
Is it Proper to say I LOVE Ewe to a sheepherder?
Is it proper for a lumberjack to say I LOVE Yew?
Is the Poplar the most Popular of trees?
Yule be surprised when there are no Presence under the tree
Poem Details | by
Hgarvey Daniel Esquire |
Categories:
funny, imagination,
A little bee flew across the sea, to see what he could be
He herd a giraffe with a throaty laugh : still continued on his weigh
This pour we bee had too pee so he stopped on a Specific Ocean Eyelid
It took him severed ours to pollinated Pollynesian flours and than he flue away
If Yew can reed this rite yore a better POET then Eye
Poem Details | by
Noel Flater |
Categories:
10th grade, career, humorous, language, sleep, today,
Toastmaster Speech - Poem
Today, writing my next Toastmasters speech
So today, my next poem will be out of reach
Hopefully next week, more words will I seek
But today, my next poem is asleep.
Noel from NoelsArt
Comments: Today, I’m writing an important Toastmasters speech. After completing my next speech, I will finish Pathways Presentation Mastery speech path, which is a great accomplishment!
Poem Details | by
Juliet Ligon |
Categories:
fun, humor, language, metaphor,
He doesn't fit in with a, e, i, o, and u.
He's more flexible, and exceptional, too.
He's the other guy,
the "sometimes" y.
He's not quite sure who he wants to be.
He's noncommittal, but very friendly.
He's a consonant, and yet, a vowel,
a monogrammic stich in a bath towel.
He's unpredictable and often sly,
who, on "Wheel Of Fortune," you do not buy.
He swings wide his stride like a Mambo dancer,
and beacons a question, challenging to answer.
Poem Details | by
Gershon Wolf |
Categories:
fate, gender, heaven, humor, identity, language,
There I was standing at the Pearly Gates
I was so excited to learn my fate
First, they sat me down
On my head a crown
Then the question ~ What are your pronouns, mate?!
Poem Details | by
Robert L. Hinshaw |
Categories:
humorous, language,
She loved sweet nothings whispered in her ear.
Her guy used salty slang when filled with beer.
"A lady I am!" she said.
"Clean up your act or drop dead!"
He's slept 'neath the sod for nearly a year!
Poem Details | by
Gail Foster |
Categories:
confusion, england, home, humorous, identity, language, places,
Words from Wiltshire
Hard to define all
You say Mildenhall
And I say Minal
“Ere, whasson?”
We say in Wiltshire
“Ere, areet then?”
“Mine’s a 6Xy beer”
”Catch you laters...”
(Sorry, when?)
by Gail
Poem Details | by
Rudolph Rinaldi |
Categories:
corruption, depression, emotions, funny, humor, pain,
when I use dirty language and curse at Alexa
she reciprocates
by playing the darkest News of the day
Poem Details | by
Tom Hitt |
Categories:
fun, funny, humor, language, poetry, satire, word play,
First of all, forget the rhyming - it's not gonna happen.
Or - if it does, by happenstance, be mildly surprised.
No loft or glory here be found - AR!
Now, like a pirate I do sound.
Dammit!
I promised you no rhymes.
A hazard spun from occupation;
a rhyme, a rhythm: (entertainin'?)
Well, maybe not, but rest assured, no fear.
'Tis not an epic, nay! The end is here.
Hooray!
~TH~ http://wrongwaywriteway.com
Poem Details | by
Dale Gregory Cozart |
Categories:
humor, language,
Rock-ribbed republicans
under
six sleek, slender saplings
fasten
red leather, yellow leather
onto
rubber baby-buggy bumpers.
(Say the long lines fast three times;
by now you know that nothing rhymes.)