Humorous and funny Gardeners poems and/or funny poems about Gardeners. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Gardeners funny poems!
Written by
John Fenn
Categories:
dedication, depression, funny, life
Gardeners Lament
The weeds that grow upon the lawn
Continue growing when they’re shorn
Though treated with a herbicide
It’s no surprise that none have died
The chemicals that you apply
Should make them shrivel up and die
But only seem to feed and nourish
Makes them grow and makes them flourish
Don’t sit there feeling all forlorn
Regarding such a sickly lawn
There’s one solution guaranteed
To eradicate, that awful weed
Get up, go out, put on your coat
Buy yourself a nanny goat
© John W Fenn 21-08-2009
Written by
Simon Hamill
Categories:
adventure, crazy, fun, funny, garden,
A Gardeners Revenge
Those bloody slugs have ate my spuds,
Not one leaf left in sight.
I sit all day with my gun,
They must only come out at night.
I've got a plan to catch them,
With nets and traps and snares.
Set my alarm for three AM,
And quietly creep down the stairs.
I set my plan in motion,
Traps around my vegetable plot.
Come on then you slimy sods
Show me what you've got.
Then the onslaught happened,
The gathering around my plot.
One must have caught the trip wire
A cascade of salt came tumbling down,
And killed the bloody lot.
18/9/2021
Written by
Julie Draper
Categories:
humor,
A Gardeners Valentine
Please be my Valentine!
I'm getting desperate now
That you will never notice me
Somewhere, sometime, somehow
Even though I've tried
To get some of your attention
I'm nowhere on your radar
I never seem to get a mention
I'm feeling quite neglected
And I'm always overlooked
I wish you would spend time with me
Instead of that new book
So in a last ditch effort
I write you this poem in a card
Please be my Valentine!
Love from your overgrown yard