Funny Poems About Free Verse or Free Verse Funny Poems

Humorous and funny Free Verse poems and/or funny poems about Free Verse. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Free Verse funny poems! Also, try our sister website's powerful search engine for poems or see our other Free Verse Poems.

Poem Details | by Maureen Mcgreavy |
Categories: funny love, woman,

Disarming Disarray

Out there
With her flair for chasing inspiration 
She draws you in her reason
Connecting dots and constellations

Tripping

She takes you by the hand
Her world as messy as her mind
You need a guide

And as you wade through her chaff
Her heaps of half thoughts
Her every whim expressed
The only thing you know for sure is

Out there exists





Date: 11.19.2019

Contest Name: Disarray

Sponsor: Nina Parmenter

Poem Details | by Charlie Smith |
Categories: fantasy, humor, imagery,

Just a Light Summer's Rain

When the sun kisses each drop of rain,
spirited colors warm the heart...
like a wind wisped feather,
landing lightly on the soul.

Romance calls,
from a fresh faint whisper
mingled cleverly among the fallen.

A daydream smiles,
in a seductive voice.

Conjured  memories evolve,
from indifference to fact,
plunging deep into fantasy,
erotically eager,
intoxicatingly anxious.

All is euphorically joyful.

05/16/2021<>


Poem Details | by Eric Nolan |
Categories: funny, happiness, life, satire, upliftingme, me,

My Butt Crack

My butt crack 
Is quite a split 
It supports the rest of me 
when I sit 
you thought I was gonna say something else didn't you ?

My butt crack 
Is a marvel to behold 
It was cute when I was young 
but now offensive since I'm old 

My butt crack 
Is pretty darn straight 
can you imagine if it was crooked 
pretty weird sight I would rate 

My butt crack 
Is funny to me 
when I bend over in my jeans 
It peeks out 
for you to see 

My butt crack 
wanted me to write this today 
for no other reason 
then just to say......................

I gotta split 


LOL 

Eric (and sometimes not)

Poem Details | by Jan Allison |
Categories: humorous, life,

Wine Connoisseur - For Contest

No one wants to be left on the shelf for years Guess you could say I’ve popped my cork Now I’m fully mature with a rich full body I could be described as a little fruity with a hint of spice Please don’t keep me bottled up Just give me time to breathe Contest :- A wine Connoisseur Sponsor: Chase Trevi 08~14~15

Poem Details | by Jan Allison |
Categories: humorous,

I Never Ever Want To See You Again

One look at you – that’s all it took Your long long legs that seem to go on forever Those eyes staring at me All I feel for you is revulsion Hate – it’s a horrible word but I simply detest you There will never be a place for you in my life ... Goodbye Then I flushed the spider down the plughole! 26th March 2015


Poem Details | by Arthur Vaso |
Categories: art, dark, evil, funny, humorous, internet,

Modern Poetry

Skip ad
poem will resume very soon
wait
pause
turn off ad block
and
ad blocker
get dressed
is not that kind of poem
vote
please favorite me
I am flavor to be
like me
love me
photoshop me
pause for second ad
add ads, subtract ads
multiply wine ads
get more wine
is a long damn add
ok
bought the Mercedes
make love
to words
iPassion
is in
snap snap and chat
latex friendships
hollywood dreams
with amex
I never leave home
there she rests
in the trunk
blood mixed
with that new car smell
everything is modern these days
even my jail cell

Poem Details | by Maureen Mcgreavy |
Categories: humor, writing,

Paper Weight

The page
bears so eagerly
the weight
of everything
inside of me
my pen prostrate
leaves a dent

I muse
this paper could use 
some weightlessness

I make an airplane
instead

Poem Details | by Ann Foster |
Categories: anti bullying, appreciation, cancer, cry, faith, humor, hurt,

The Unhappy Hostess

Come into my house, 
Sit anywhere you like. 

No, not at my table, 
No, not on my chair. 
Come into my house,
Sit anywhere.

I invited you, 
I opened up my home.
Oh, I changed my mind, 
It is a vaulted tome.
Sit anywhere.

Come into my house,
You really are not welcome.
You are a phantom guest, 
And a sadly, unwanted pest,
Yet still...
Sit anywhere.

It is a perfect place,
You should have been more proud, 
Just to be invited, 
And permitted, in the crowd. 
Sit anywhere. 

With rules and hidden spaces.
And a common thought out plan, 
You do not fit, so do not sit, 
“Sit anywhere”.

Poem Details | by Scott Thirtyseven |
Categories: giggle, humorous, morning,

Morning

MORNING

Good morning World.

Damn you!
and your warm
sunray fingers
prying open my eyes.

Robbing me of my
nocturnal fantasies,
my semiconscious bliss.

Leaving the remnants
of my peace 
and tranquillity
laying scattered across
my face and through
my hair.

Your rising light
shrinking the shadows
of my freedom.

I will not be seduced
by your clear blue promises.

For your pressing realities
already taste foul
in my mouth.

Leave me Morning
to my diminishing serenity.


I have performed this piece and it shows on you tube (I hope this works, if not try copying to your address bar):
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=egYjy4Iu5e8&feature=youtu.be
enjoy

Poem Details | by Jan Allison |
Categories: car, humorous,

Vodge Diper

The day started badly as I had a bat flattery on my vodge diper

It was roaring with pain when I arrived at the par cark at the mall
Went to put my bopping in the shoot and I turned into a bowel feast
I’d had a blushing crow… there was a rent in the dear
It had been hit by a bunken drum  - I was mopping had!

He tried to apologise but was whiring his slords
I got out my phobile moan and a policeman cook my tall
He arrived at the mall in his canda par at the lead of spite
After my lad buck I went home to tell dumb and mad
Dad teased my ears, said I could use the buttle shush until it was mended 

Contest: Spoonerisms Sponsored by Roy Jerden
02~29~16

Poem Details | by Jan Allison |
Categories: humorous, love,

I Love To Hate You

Just one look at you Tempting me, teasing me, tormenting me I hate the feelings you evoke Greed Desire Lust Just want to hold you, devour you I don’t want to see you go But I can never resist the last chocolate in the box! 9th March 2015 Contest – Love or Hate – Pick a subject - Shadow Hamilton I chose Love as my theme ~awarded 1st place~

Poem Details | by Jan Allison |
Categories: food, humorous, thanksgiving,

Thank Goodness It's Only Once a Year

Turkey so dry that I can’t speak Brussel sprouts boiled for a week Roast potatoes burnt to a crisp Lumpy gravy I feel Sick Jan Allison 26th October Inspired by Andrea’s contest but not written for it!

Poem Details | by Jan Allison |
Categories: humorous, valentines day, roses are red,

My Funny Valentine

Roses are red Violets are blue I’m up for a quickie Do you fancy one too? 13th February 2015

Poem Details | by Liam Mcdaid |
Categories: funny,

Funny Onion

Out shopping met an old friend from school
he turns to me serious looking
what are you at these days 
Well says I
working for a China man
picking up crumbs 
for disabled birds
Those with broken wings
who are unable to fly smiling
to warmer sunnier climates

Whoa he sounded shocked
he said what a job
What's the money like 
he asked laughing out loud
I said less than peanuts
out all weathers 
Barely feed a mouse

God I am glad he said 
that I have bumped into you
saying you have just really cheered me up
What a man really needed
Peanuts I replied
He began laughing 
saying that I was a character
really brightened up his dull day
leaving all I heard was him laughing

Poem Details | by Jan Allison |
Categories: color, crush, food, humorous,

Obsessive Orange

I met this cool dude called Jaffa At the beginning he was so sweet to me Sadly after a while he gave me the pip In the end he ran out of juice and I had to squash him Then I pulverised his flesh to a pulp Cheers! Contest: United Colours Orange Sponsored by Silent One 03~04~16

Poem Details | by Rhona Mcferran |
Categories: food, humor, humorous, silly,

Cheesecake Nightmare

Love me or hate me
few people can take me
plain, unadulterated, true to myself
their compulsive need to gussy me up
or completely disguise me
gives me nightmares...
Horrible- horrible!

The worst is where
they try to make me
Savory.

Suffocated in sauces, sweet relish
and pickled beets
garnished with green olives
and fussy-cut vienna sausages
all dancing in fancy chorus lines
on top of me
Oh No! I can't take it...
It just can't be!

What are they thinking?!

I awake with a snug sensation
as something warmish
drapes and
drizzles
down my back
AAAAAHHH!
Caramel sauce-
Thank God!

Poem Details | by Moonbee Canady |
Categories: daughter, family, funny, happiness, life, love, mother, nature, nostalgia, peace, people, seasons

Its Raining...

Its Raining…

God’s Cleansing Tool
Cloud-Concerto… How Cool !
Plop-Plop Plopping into Pothole Pools
On the Grass, Pavements and On My Own-Sweet- Fools…

who, don’t have Sense enough, to get out of the Rain…
… I think I’ll go Join Them… Again

                               Amen

Poem Details | by Jannie Breedt |
Categories: best friend, funny, grandfather, old,

Old Man Time

Redeployed in an ugly skin
Pleated and spotted and grumpy within
What I call walking ,they call shuffling
I'm bending down to tie my shoe
While Im down here what else can I do?

When driving down my lip protrudes
Only for the dentist will I open mouth
Okay , Ill wave at you but I wont smile
The dog and the toilet are my only true friends
You get up to go and then you go again

Memories are yesterday
Forgetfulness is all over today
Ill tell you what it is
But forgot what I was going to say

Got to buy dogfood
Where are my glasses?
Who am I talking to?
They've all gone away

Poem Details | by Anya Chebukina |
Categories: funny, love,

Basements Basements

This is just for fun..=)




In the basement of my heart
there is a basement
and in that basement there are two basements. 

You open one
and enter the basement 
only to find out there is yet another basement

That basements basement 
was light and blue
But that basements basement
was black

from basement to basement you walked 
until you couldn't anymore

The basements basements 
basements basements basements 
basements basements basements basement
of my heart.

You found my love...

Poem Details | by Terry L. Allen |
Categories: funny,

The Human Smile

Nothing in the world so disarming,
so charming in it's domain.
Across a crowded room or two feet away
it's all the same.
The shortest distance between two people
despite any other claim.
Is for now and will forever be
with no denial the human smile.

Poem Details | by Roger Wilson |
Categories: animal, betrayal, fate, giggle,

The Frog and the Cricket

The frog croaked
The cricket chirped
The cricket croaked
The frog burped

Poem Details | by Nick Bagnall |
Categories: funny, loss

Missing You

She was wonderful and powerful
My object of desire
Her smooth clean face so beautiful
The apple of my eye

My love she had an accident
She fell from up on high
I found her broken body there
'Twas lying on the ground

Now all I have's her memory
The songs we used to share
Oh how I miss that ipod
My heart it megahertz

Poem Details | by Jessica Amanda Salmonson |
Categories: animal, death, funny, humor, satire, silly, spiritual,

Two Wolves

Each of us have two wolves living inside us
One wants to eat burritos
and watch horror movies.

The other wants to walk about 
in its underpants all day 
snacking on cheetos between long naps. 

The wolf that thrives is the one 
who lives on with diabetes while the other
dies of a heart attack.

Poem Details | by Paula Goldsmith |
Categories: hate, humor, love, relationship, today, together, uplifting,

Today

Today,
I love you.
Today,
I hate you.
This week,
I love you,
This week,
I hate you.
Can this go on,
it has for years.
This love hate relationship,
is now over.
I am kicking you to the curb,
to the trash can you must go.
Did you figure me out,
I am your bathroom scale.
Hooray~you are gone.

Poem Details | by Jan Allison |
Categories: humorous, poetry, word play,

Have I Ever Told You That

Deer poet tree righters fore the cite 

Pleas will ewe bee sweet 
and worn me if ewe have scene any miss stakes eye have maid
butt eye no my speeling and ewes off English is prefect!


Eye am knot shore if eye have ever tolled ewe 
that when eye right poet tree at knight ore in the mourning
eye don’t knead too ewes a smell chequer ore a theo sorearse

Off coarse, eye don’t no weather aisle get a first plaice inn the con test
butt eye want John too chews me sew eye can crews two victory!


HAVE I EVER TOLD YOU THAT...... Poetry Contest


Sponsored by John Lawless

11/11/20