Funny Poems About Fear or Fear Funny Poems

Humorous and funny Fear poems and/or funny poems about Fear. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Fear funny poems!

Written by Carolyn Devonshire
Categories: fear, humor, inspirational,

A Fear Greater Than Death

There is just one thing people fear more than death
Speaking before an audience

Really, more than death?

Written by Tomas Vazquez
Categories: adventure, easter, fear, funny, nonsense, religion,

Twas the Night Before Easter

He knows if you are sleeping,
He knows when you're awake,
He knows if you've been bad or good.
Zombie Jesus must be staked!

So eat your crackers and wine,
And think that you'll be saved,
But that's not why he's here because
Your brains are what he craves!

He'll never stop his rampage.
Not until he's fully fed,
But nothing satisfies his hunger
Like what rattles in your head.

He's coming down the chimney.
He's underneath your bed.
You think you can outrun him,
But soon you will be dead.

So you better not whisper,
You better not cry
Cuz even a shot between his eyes
Won't stop Zombie Jesus, tonight..


Written by CayCay Jennings
Categories: fear, funny,

My Human Folly

We will all die
So we cry loud
And try for thought.

Wrong lane, wrong way.
Death delay, pray.
Cars stray and honk.

Oh, please, cars – clear.
Turns appear soon,
I steer, we cheer.




... CayCay Jennings
February 13, 2016

Written by Lochan Chugh
Categories: death, emotions, fear, humor, life, loneliness, sun,

Let's Die

It was a height of 250 metres,
But I wasn’t afraid;
I looked down
And there wasn’t even my shade.

The sun was already jumping
But with a low speed,
“ I can perform better,
 I am not going to give the lead.”

Took a deep breath
And I was in air,
Time stopped,
And silence reached there.

The sun began moving upward,
Or I began moving downward,
I was flying,
But like a dead bird.

When from the ground,
I wasn’t really high;
Mind said,“ change in plan,
Let the sun first die”.

Written by Paloma P
Categories: allegory, day, deep, emotions, fear, humor, hyperbole,

Nothing More Or Less

hid insecurities within
  ambiguous humor &
   convoluted whimsies,
rules consistently changing
 in a game which required
hardly more than breath,
  nothing less than obscurity
     twisting a fallible fancy, 
    seizing day's intangibility


Written by Evelyn Judy Buehler
Categories: dark, fantasy, fear, fun, funny, hilarious, nonsense,

Beware

The rimpledeeduggs klacklety splatt britly floaming,
Ere flamping drakkurz snazzle at elvitty gloaming;
Yon jamweezy wudderslimps gamwracks smotly crawling,
Hoytaling pagartrimps flotlessly wrothful in bawling!

Beete stell ere yethle flagorns craithen yere eise,
Ort smoothle yourn mithredoons bakk toon codry skize;
Bodryluntz quidups moost stupuddle cudgely pierdax,
And zakkertic flibboots wraithling in yert tardly tracks!

Written by Edward Ibeh
Categories: adventure, emotions, fear, humor,

Gone Spelunking

I went in not feeling much excitement. 
              Further into the cave I did venture. 
             Claustrophobia robs my enjoyment
               As I began my scary adventure;
             Far from ideal stroll out in nature. 
         I vowed "I'm done being a thrill seeker!"
            As I trailed other spelunkers deeper...
            Into the cave afraid it might cave in! 
           Luckily, I didn't meet the grim reaper! 
            Try again? Now that's a cardinal sin! 


Date written: 10/11/2020

Written by Anne-Lise Andresen
Categories: fear, humor,

- Cheap Soap -

Pat lived in externality

                                  Thanks to frugality

                             his life insurance ... cheap soap

                              blissful moment of life's hopes

                               2 bucks saved his mortality








                        * Stay healthy ... wash your hands often *



23.03.2020
Sun :) - A-L Andresen :)
Copyright © All Rights Reserved

Written by Theresa A.K.A. Reecie
Categories: fear, funny, social,

The Sad Truth About Life

Oh the horror! For people, it's just fun!
~Reecie

Written by Dan Keir
Categories: allah, angel, angst, courage, dream, education, faith, fantasy, fear, funny, god, heaven, history, hope, humorous, imagination, inspirational, introspection, jesus, journey, life, lonely, loss, lost, lost love, love, miracle, mystery, nostalgia, on work and working, parody, passion, peace, people, philosophy, political, prayer, recovery from..., religion, religious, spiritual, stress, success, sympathy, teacher, time, write,

Haikus About God: V

Omniscient guy
Yet he lets bad things happen
How can he exist?

Written by A.O. Taner
Categories: beautiful, change, cheer up, confidence, cool, courage, cute love, deep, destiny, emotions, environment, fantasy, fear, feelings, first love, for her, funny love, happiness, happy, how i feel, humanity, hyperbole, i am, i love you, inspiration, journey, joy, life, lost love, love, love hurts, miss you, missing, missing you, ocean, paradise, philosophy, pride, romance, romantic, senses, smile, spring, sunshine, travel, uplifting, wind,

Rainbow

imagine the rainbow being
the dark tunnel 
you've been stuck in for years

the lighthouse on the horizon,
the beam 
that gets brighter as it nears

get soaked in the rain,
feel the sun in your heart,
let go of all your fears.

Written by Mark Goodson
Categories: childhood, family, fear, children, funny, life, mother,

A Mother's Discipline

With soap in hand placed in my mouth
Head hangs over toliet tongue heads south
Dirty words no more

Written by J.W. Earnings
Categories: angst, change, childhood, confusion, depression, fear, feelings, children, kids, funny, growing up, home, homework, humor, inspiration, lonely, me, miss you, moving on, nature, pain, poetry, school, self, sorrow, stress, teen, time, writing, youth,

My Boredom Disease

Like sick allergies, 
Boredom can be passed around
I call it: THE BOREDOM DISEASE

Like a horrid storm,
Boredom can catch you off guard
Hold on for DEAR LIFE!

Like the whooping cough,
Boredom can be serious
If I were you, I’d
Get a vaccination !

Written by Tim Ryerson
Categories: funny,

I Fear That Pinocchio -

Confessed to creator Geppetto
"Got a fetish, I think you should know
Often I fiddle
‘Round with my middle
Take a look-see how THAT baby grows!"

Sumitted for: Roy Jerden's contest

Written by Tirzah Conway
Categories: angst, childhood, confusion, dedication, devotion, faith, family, fear, funeral, funny, hope, imagination, life, mother, nature, on writing and words, parody, people,

Where Does the Time Go

I feel as though time is slipping away,
And more is gone each passing day…

Written by Dan Keir
Categories: adventure, angst, autumn, business, confusion, dark, dedication, depression, fear, grief, growing up, happiness, happy, hate, health, home, hope, humorous, imagination, inspirational, introspection, journey, life, lonely, loss, lost, love, on work and working, pain, parody, people, relationship, retirement, sad, satire, school, social, stress, success, sympathy, time, work,

Reflections: Midlife Crisis

P     aranoia permeates, etching itself into your fractured face,
A     cacophony of constant pressure; life remains a stressful race,
N     othing to hope for, no positives like promotion in the workplace,
I      nability to love, relationships lift anchor and set sail without chase,
C     hildren crushing dreams under mortgages; age grows with disgrace
!!

Written by Richard Lamoureux
Categories: childhood, desire, fear, giggle, growing up,

She Is Chiclet Perfection

There is nothing better than seeing that smile!
       Her crinkled nose and effortless style
             Chiclet perfect and care free
                   The best way to be
                           Angelic
                              She
                       With her clique 
                  They just walk by me
              It appears I'm hard to see
       Still I choose to stick around a while
There is nothing better than seeing that smile!



A school boy's nightmare, occupying the space outside the friend zone.

For Andrea's new form contest.

A name for the form: Double Triangulation.

Written by Kim Shaw
Categories: assonance, fear, funny,

Spider Hyper

Picnic was peaceful

A spider crawled down her neck

screech heard round the world

Written by Jan Allison
Categories: fear, food, graduation, humorous,

Graduation Dessert Dilemma

Reading my son’s graduation dinner menu It filled me with consternation Will I make a foolish choice … I’m full of trepidation My favourite dessert is on the list It’s stiffie cockie pudding Oops – there I go I meant sticky toffee pudding If I make my spoonerism – I hope and pray it will be missed!! My first poem posted here is called ‘Just Desserts’ and is a true story. When I read my son’s graduation dinner menu I just HAVE to order this pudding – wish me luck on the day!!!! 6th June 2016

Written by Tammy Reams
Categories: fear, humorous, men, pain, power,

Men and Hunting

Brave man
                              buckshot
                              rear rump
                              hot lead
                              stings red
                              pants drop
                              sees blood
                              Fainted!

 3/30/15     contest sponsored by: Judy Konos  'Your Footle Poem'
                         T Reams       1st Place

Written by J.W. Earnings
Categories: adventure, animal, confusion, courage, fear, funny, imagination, inspirational, life, lost, nature, on work and working, pain, relationship, stress, time, tree, uplifting, work,

Zookeeper

Lookin' after pests
Keepin' a CLOSE eye on 'em
"Those wild animals!"

Roamin' around zoo
Searchin' for sneaky monkey
Hidin' in a tree

Zookeeper gets mad
"Where's Marty, the smartypants!?"
"He TOOK my cage keys!"

Written by Timothy Hicks
Categories: anxiety, bereavement, courage, fear, humor, loneliness, nature,

Is Humanity That Bad

"Is humanity that bad?" pondered the lighthouse keeper, frightened with the sea




Written March 27th, 2016
For the See or Feel Contest Hosted by Poet Destroyer

Placed 2nd

Written by Linda-Marie Sweetheart
Categories: fear, funny,

Joe Willie Namath

"Joe Willie Namath" Joe Willie Namath Super Bowl famous shaved his football legs to sell pantyhose wore white mink coat on sidelines for camera pose. Broadway Joe Willie drinking booze made him silly on ESPN ..Suzie refused to be kissed captured on sports video fans booed and hissed. *For P.D.'S Clerihew Contest.

Written by Anthony Scandrick Ii
Categories: angel, beautiful, beauty, caregiving, childhood, confusion, courage, dark, daughter, death, dedication, depression, devotion, dream, faith, fear, forgiveness, freedom, friendship, girlfriend, grief, happiness, hate, heaven, hope, humorous, imagination, life, lonely, loss, lost, lost love, love, miracle, passion, peace, relationship, romance, romantic, sorrow, sorry, stress, sympathy, uplifting, heart, hate, hate, heart,

Never Take Hate Outside

When you're hurt inside,
And there's no where to hide,
And there's no one on your side,
And it's killing your pride,
Inside,
Never take hate outside,

When your heart is chocking,
The heavy words never spoken,
The things that hurt you inside,
When love has died,
Inside,
Never take hate outside,

When your heart is gone,
From being alone,
And it beats a solemn tone,

When you're cold inside,
It's only a short ride,
Never take hate outside

Written by Kim Merryman
Categories: fear, funny,

I Don'T Like Spiders

Spiders and I have a deal,
They don't come near me and I won't squeal.
But sometimes they forget,
Then I get upset,
And I squeal cause they broke our deal!


8/2/13