Funny Poems About Farting or Farting Funny Poems

Humorous and funny Farting poems and/or funny poems about Farting. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Farting funny poems! Also, try our sister website's powerful search engine for poems or see our other Farting Poems.

Poem Details | by Jan Allison |
Categories: for her, humorous, nature,

Farting Cows - a Taxing Time For Farmers - For Anne Lise

When a Norwegian cow passes gas They want to tax the gas from its ‘***’ A cow passes 4 tonnes of methane each year Just imagine the stink from its rear!!!! Thanks for the inspiration Anne Lise *** Jan Allison 31st March 2016

Poem Details | by Ken Duddle |
Categories: food, funny,

No Farting Allowed

There was a man named Fred Who liked eating baked beans in bed One day when he farted He and his wife parted 'Well it's quicker than divorce' Said Fred.


Poem Details | by Jean Murray |
Categories: dog, girlfriend, humorous,

Farting Farmer

There once was a farmer called Seamus,
who had an incompetant anus.
When out on a date with girlfriend Kate,
he blamed his dog when he farted,
to prevent her being startled.

Poem Details | by Barbara Gorelick |
Categories: funny, life,

Farting Contests

All little boys like to master the fart Among their peers its considered an art It must be loud To make them proud If stinky, a winner right from the start

Poem Details | by Jan Allison |
Categories: body, humorous, wind,

The Art of Farting

I’ve perfected the art Of withholding a fart I tighten my buttocks and clench But when no one is the vicinity I let rip with a dreadful stench 28th March 2016 Jan Allison


Poem Details | by Jun-Jun Villanueva |
Categories: funny,

' No Farting Allowed ' - a Scene In a Car With Friends

~*~ ========================== sultry aestival zephyr's puffing as elated lilt's playing - I'm huffing abdominal heftiness yeah! it exploded! SUCCESS! OOOPS!!! earphones plugged in ears . . . they're laughing. +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Poem Details | by Jan Allison |
Categories: humorous, wind,

The Art of Farting

I’m dining with my uncle Bart And release an SBD fart My fart stinks like hell But Bartie can’t tell Because we’re two meters apart! (sbd = silent but deadly) 08/06/21

Poem Details | by Sara Kendrick |
Categories: funny,

No Farting Allowed

There once was a story quietly told A memoir was embrassingly bold A lady took antacid For she was very lucid As antigas formula own tale rolled
Lucid means here easily understood Sponsor: Destroyer~Poet Contest:pooping contest

Poem Details | by Deborah Burch |
Categories: funny, satire,

No Farting Allowed

No Farting Allowed



rushed lunch of cabbage 
at work  no farting allowed
                            small dog approaches





*blushing* deborah burch©
5/15/0212

Poem Details | by Prince Ekpemandu |
Categories: funny,

No Farting Allowed

Hold it! i am warning you
NO FARTING ALLOWED!
The rest room is near 
you...
DON'T FART OUT LOUD

NO OOZING BOMBS ! Not 
those 
I am not ready to die,so 
stop that art
The last time you fart 
You murdered  my nose

I say NO FART ALLOWED 
DEAR!
The last world war was a 
pretty good  scare
Please don't start 
another one here
Oh! that oozing smell 
who can bear.....

Poem Details | by Debra Falgout |
Categories: funny,

No Farting Allowed

No farting allowed


Let me see
Will I come out in tries one, two or three

She sits on the bowl, straining, oh lord
I won't come out, its so hard

Constipation, its a mess
Come out, come out, I won't settle for less

Finally feeling the poop, I'm almost out
Ha Ha tricked you, a fart, she shouts

Ok, ok, i will settle your stress
Ploop in the bowl, time to swim I guess


Contest by *DP*
Written by:  Debra M. Falgout

Poem Details | by Abdullah Alhemaidy |
Categories: allegory, analogy, humor, nonsense,

Farting

Farting is a cool poised own vis 
Has safe six-fold gains of wellness  
It may seems cannot -at all- be a vista
Yet, sure it does good to your viscera
It is fine to say to it "be a vis"!
It is all natural healthful process
No need for any sort of prowess 
Laughing because of a sudden fart,
Rudely that is seems its only fine art

Poem Details | by Jan Allison |
Categories: body, humorous, silly, wind,

A Windy Day On the Isle of Man - With Apologies To Shakespeare For Writing a Sonnet On Farting

It was a windy day on the Isle of Man (I guess I shouldn’t eat fried beans for tea) My hubby said ‘Just stop farting Jan’ Please fit a cork where no one can see! So a cork got inserted where the sun don’t shine And we went for a long walk by the sea When a cork whizzed past - but it wasn’t mine Alas, it got wedged high up in a tree The owner of the cork used his walking stick instantly the cork dropped down like a rocket He picked it up; oh gee he was so quick Then he placed the cork in his pocket I gave the poor chap a sympathetic smile Then whispered ‘forget the cork… just fart free style’ FICTION WRITE!!!!!! 11-03-17

Poem Details | by Sashi Prabhu |
Categories: funny, nature,

No Farting Allowed

why fart and waste 
when you have the option of burp and taste.....

and then again......

why fart and smell..............
when you can burp taste and tell..........

and after all the farting if you need to poop
when the session is on if you look down ,all you  see is something like soup............

yet

I go and sit on my throne,
it has a plastic top but is made of marble stone......

I go there to excrete and stink..........
but on my throne for hours, i sit and think...........

Doing nothing but scratch my balls,
as i admire  the soap stains on the walls................

Poem Details | by Trevor Mcleod |
Categories: analogy, funny, how i feel, howl, humanity, humorous, old,

Valet Farting

I watched her lift her leg and fart
and said that must be age and heart
But wondered why she needed help
when all that gas was power felt

And thought her sick for just the cause
and yelled at her for what it was
And said I saw her let it go
and wondered if you're nuts or so

And she would blush and say a thing
like so you saw me what's the ding
And I would say I've never seen
a woman fart and carry swing

For what I knew as just a kid
was fart real loud and not with lid
So helping hands would never lift
what *** to all was border'd gift

Poem Details | by Barbara Washington |
Categories: funny

Farting In My Ear

Feeling somewhat icky trying to keep my peace
Annoying, stinky farts never do you cease
Rude and vulgar every time I’m near
Talking and farting in my ear
I know it’s all on purpose just to eerk my nerve
Never farting in pubic or around the kids, you serve 
Gross farts to start a fight, cut it out!

Poem Details | by Karen Croft |
Categories: funny,

Farting

Walking farts don't count 
it's the silent deadly ones 
that leave people in disbelief