Humorous and funny Fart poems and/or funny poems about Fart. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Fart funny poems!
Written by
Jan Allison
Categories:
body, humorous, wind,
He's Having a Fart Attack
A constipated vicar named Bart
Was in church when he dropped a huge fart
He said 'Lord I have sinned'
For I’ve got pooey wind
Blushing scarlet he did soon depart!
26th April 2016
Written by
Sasha Marchlewski
Categories:
funny, husband,
Like a Fart
I'm like a fart
Puff I'm here
There is no easy escape
Once I am here
No one gets away
Once I've gone
It's only a matter of time
Before I return
For my husband on chili night... Love you!!
Written by
Jan Allison
Categories:
body, humorous, wind,
I'M Having a Fart Attack
My cousin’s just earned his degree
He majored in fartology
Now he can impart
What foods make me fart
He’s obsessed by scatology
I confessed that beans give me wind
(It matters not if fresh or tinned)
And onions and sprouts
In any amounts
cause farting that I can’t rescind
The wind I produce is quite drastic
as medics say my colon’s spastic
my poor tummy swells
I release foul smells
I’m thankful my waistband ‘s elastic
FICTIONAL POEM FOR FART-TASTIC CONTEST
Sponsored by Chantelle Anne Cooke
09/15/21
Written by
Erich Goller
Categories:
funny,
Big Fart
Big Fart
Jack has a bulldog. Boy can he fart
Phooey, they do not come from the heart
Don’t ever feed him beans
Or the odor gets mean
Never needs a battery to start
Tickle me pinck contest Oct 31
Written by
Jan Allison
Categories:
america, humorous, political,
There's An Old Fart In the White House
I've checked the date it’s not April Fool’s Day -
Trump’s President of the U S of A
These words to you I impart
To me a ‘trump’ is a fart
In the White House this old farts gonna stay!
01~21~17
Written by
Nastoshia Siedlecki
Categories:
funny,
Fart Insurance
in the cold dark depth of silence
hallow "insert name"
fart insurance was created
so i could pass the blame
the odds have never been so great
nor has the passing pain
when the butler has to hang his head
and just accept the shame
fart insurance is the reason
rich folks don't pass gas
instead they like to tell you how
flowers shoot out their ***
Written by
Volodymyr Knyr
Categories:
age, art, humorous, irony, people, sound, work,
A Fart
For a farter a fart
is an object of art.
Volodymyr Knyr
2017
Written by
Olorunsogo David
Categories:
funny,
The Fart Factory
Different firm within the factory
The location the belly
Cowpea the raw material be
Having brought into the factory
But afore processed to be boiled
The tongue a transporter
From the gate of the mouth
Passing through the oesophagus track-way
Enzymes within functioning as workers
And the finished product derived
Distributed by the anus
The fart is produced
For the consumption of the people
Written by
Jan Allison
Categories:
humorous, political,
Trumpkin Pumpkin Is Just An Old Fart
Chuck’s carving a huge pumpkin mask
It’s really a challenging task
It will look like Don Trump
When he’s taking a dump
In orange glow Trumpty will bask
Trump annoys the Democrat votas
They’re praying Biden will be Potus
Let’s hope Joe will win through
Trump cryin' oh boo hoo
left drifting along with his floatas
10/25/20
Written by
Jan Allison
Categories:
humorous, wind,
He's Having a Fart Attack Ii
Art’s doctor prescribed lactulose
Wife Betty’s seen holding her nose
I’m sorry for Arty
The meds make him farty
But Betty is near comatose
03/20/21
Written by
Jamie Pan
Categories:
fun, giggle,
Fart
Your fart is filled with toxic fumes
that nobody can stand,
If there's to be a fart got talent,
I'm sure yours will be grand.
06/01/17
Written by
Mark Koplin
Categories:
humor,
The Fart Police
A homeless fart, an unpaid lease
Evicted through a darkened crease
This eviction note
On air it will float
Carried out by the fart police
Written by
Nastoshia Siedlecki
Categories:
funny,
Mega Fart
well here comes another fart
but leaving a nasty tart
i blew wind knocking over the plants
only thing i teared a hole in my pants
then ripped them apart
neighbor just grunted and said thats..smart..
stinking up the earth
was it really that worth
its like an atomic bomb
don't worry people just be calm
the stench will go away in june
but relax june will be here soon.....
Written by
Virginia Gelok
Categories:
body, crazy, fate, fun, giggle, hilarious,
Ladies Don'T Fart
We hear her mutter,
To cover the "flutter".
What a spoof,
We heard the "poof".
Such a hoot,
When she "toots".
And it never ever stinks!
We know it, "wink, wink, wink."
Written by
Jan Allison
Categories:
humorous, wind,
Fart Footles
Pass gas
From ***
Make smell
From hell
You fart
Eyes smart
Here goes
Hold nose
Drop one
Stink bomb
It stank
Smells rank
Need loo
Do pooh
Jan Allison
4th September 2014
Written by
Jan Allison
Categories:
humorous, word play,
A Trump Means a Fart - For Alexis
In Britain a trump is a fart
My father perfected his art
Foul farts he would push
Right out of his tush
Gasping for fresh air I would dart!
So... I guess that means the Potus is just an old wind bag
10/27/20
Written by
John Lawless
Categories:
funny,
The Language of the Fart
with beans and a biscuit to ponder
a rumbling seeking a yonder
at its behest
a simple request
oh speak you toothless wonder
9/29/2021
May The Gas Be With You Farts Part 2 Poetry Contest
Written by
Jerry T Curtis
Categories:
humor,
Chez Pierre S Fart Cafe
Pierre's Fart Café
Inspired By Mystic Rose
Please visit her page
For more inspiration !
We serve our Fartpays
As we do everyday
When we do, we say "Bon Appétit"
Each day they're made fresh
Strained through a mesh
Then threshed, and readied to eat
I like mine, with spice
And bake beans fried twice
Jalapeños, sure would be sweet
So, visit today,
Chez Pierre's Fart Café
A place where there's always a seat
Written by
Jan Allison
Categories:
humorous, wind,
Old Fart - Warning May Contain Humour
I hate visiting Uncle Dwain
His farting just drives me insane
When he drops a bomb
I just glare at mom
Cos in my chair I must remain
He say kids are seen but not heard
I sit and daren’t utter a word
Don’t care what he thinks
I know his butt stinks
And think he smells like an old turd
06/03/21
Written by
Jan Allison
Categories:
humorous, integrity,
Owd Fart
You linger
just like a foul smell ...
I've come to accept
you're just an old fart!
5/17/19
Written by
Mike Gentile
Categories:
body, humor, humorous, sky,
Fart In a Bubble
If someone could fart in a bubble
Would save us a great deal of trouble
To float then on high
And burst in the sky
The clouds would clear out on the double
Written by
Jim Tidd
Categories:
children, humor,
My Mini-Fart Blossum
[NOTE: This was written for both my son's enjoyment; the younger, the offending one, who is teased by his brother and me. He was about ten when I wrote it and it made him laugh out loud.]
Oh, that smell from Chimo’s room,
Was it partnered by a sonic boom?
Bet the neighbors started to faint,
and wager walls were peeling paint;
I spied the local cats go fleeing,
squirrels dead, that’s what I’m seeing,
even roaches were fast escaping,
sure hope there’s not another shaping.
That odor is like his mom's to me,
that acorn fell not far from tree!
Fart Blossom we called her, somewhat teasey,
so now we’ve named him Cheesy Breezy.
Written by
Trevor Mcleod
Categories:
analogy, appreciation, conflict, crazy, crush, funny love, humorous,
Fart Head
She called me fart head
She really hates the poets
She's never really meant much
But fey; to her to know it
All wise within her own shell
How could she call to smelled it
If only she were not right
and I could say to Stow It!
Written by
Jack Ellison
Categories:
hilarious,
Simply Fart
If people talk about you behind your back... simple fart
That should do the trick, that'll blow them off the cart
They won't do that again
That'll end that... amen
Some people need a rude awakening that farts impart
Written by
Jack Ellison
Categories:
humorous,
Fart Hits
Celine Dion magic “My Fart Will Go On” from Titantic
Or “Total Eclipse Of My Fart” by Bonnie Tyler... dynamic
Where would we be
Odor quite heady
“Don't Go Breaking My Fart” an Sir Elton classic