Humorous and funny Epitaph poems and/or funny poems about Epitaph. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Epitaph funny poems!
Written by
Paul Callus
Categories:
death, funny,
Sidney Snoozer
Here lies Sidney Snoozer, a lover of sleep,
His last nap eternal – relaxed, six foot deep.
For Epitaph Contest 2
Hosted by Jesse Rowe
© 15th April 2019
Written by
Gregory Richard Barden
Categories:
death, eulogy, humorous, light,
Tom E Aiken
My wife deplored her duty
But O' was she good-looking
She sold me on her beauty
But killed me with her cooking
~ 3rd Place ~ in the "A Funny Epitaph" Poetry Contest, Jesse Rowe, Judge & Sponsor.
Written by
Tom Cunningham
Categories:
death, humor,
Fred the Baker Rip
In this vault are a few crumbs of crusty old Fred
He got stuck in an oven and got baked with the bread
A very popular man, his friends didn't think twice
When offered a keepsake, their very own slice.
Written 14 April 2019.
Not for contest.
Written by
Wendy Watson
Categories:
humor,
Accountant's Epitaph
His days were numbered
01.02.2023
Bite Size Poem No75 Poetry Contest
Line Gauthier
Your Decision Poetry Contest
Sponsor: Brian Strand
Written by
Wendy Watson
Categories:
humorous,
A Bridge Too Far
Here lie a dentist and his wife.
Long in the tooth they left this life.
Young Smith inherits in the will
Two gold crowns and a dental drill!
13/09/18
' A funny epitaph contest' : Sponsored by Jesse Rowe
Written by
Charles Messina
Categories:
humorous,
The Graves of Jesse James
Two empty coffins...with unknown names
Saved for the unfortunates...of Jesse James
Made for the men, they say...Jesse killed
Only a matter of time, they'll both...be filled
An Epitaph To Make Me Laugh Poetry Contest
Sponsored by Jesse Rowe
4-22-2019
Written by
Gregory Richard Barden
Categories:
death, eulogy, humorous,
Here Lies Festus Sleape
We're asleep in this graveyard
We can't hear you pout
So please leave your flowers
And get the hell out
Written by
Robert L. Hinshaw
Categories:
humor,
Perpetual Claustrophobia - An Epitaph
'Neath this sod dwells Mavis who suffered many a phobia
Makes one wonder how she's handling claustrophobia
Written by
Dave Moore
Categories:
analogy, animal, future, god, humorous, life, men,
Devilution
Before there was a thing called "Man"
The Maker had a better plan.
He filled he sea with little fish
Of every kind that He might wish.
Then He made the dinosaur
To rule the land from shore to shore.
Next came the monks, orang-otan.
Gorillas, and an ape called "Man".
Man is half God, and beast one half.
He writes his own grim epitaph.
The Maker thinks, "Next time the plants?
Not yet, until I've tried the ants".
Written by
Tom Cunningham
Categories:
death, grave, humor,
Unlucky Jim
Beneath lie the remains of unlucky Jim
A great white shark made a meal of him
Fell off his surf board and hit by a wave
Half inside ‘Jaws’ and half in this grave.
Written on 13 September 2018
For a funny epitaph poetry contest
Sponsored by Jesse Rowe.
Written by
Gregory Richard Barden
Categories:
death, eulogy, humorous,
Hope S Gaughan
I had hoped for angels
But in earth I will stay
For my husband died first
And he scared them away
Written by
Tania Kitchin
Categories:
fun, humor,
Lucille Ball
Here lies the remains of the great Lucille Ball
The best fiery redhead comedian of them all
Even after she kicked drunk Desi Arnez to the curb
Her vitameatavegamin TV episode was superb
Written on 4/12/19
Written by
Jan Allison
Categories:
death, humorous,
No More Clowning Around
Here lie the remains of Ethel Brown
A circus clown from County Down
She’s buried wearing her red plastic nose
‘Twill be the last of Ethel to decompose!
An Epitaph to Make Us Laugh 2 Poetry Contest
Sponsored by Jesse Rowe
4/12/19
Written by
Gregory Richard Barden
Categories:
death, eulogy, humorous,
Rip M T Pocquettes
Here's a hammer for my debtors
For my bills, I couldn't pay
Just take a piece of marble
And then please go away
Written by
Wendy Watson
Categories:
humor,
No More Close Shaves
This grave with barber Bob is blessed ~
He was a cut above the rest!
30.01.19
'Pithy pants poetry contest'
Sponsored by: Maureen McGreavy
Written by
Joseph May
Categories:
funny,
The Last Filling
Here lies dentist Sam Billing
This patch of earth he is now filling!
4-12-19
An Epitaph To Make Us Laugh 2 Contest
Sponsor: Jesse Rowe
Written by
Tom Cunningham
Categories:
humor,
Andrew John Greenwidge Rip
Buried deep in this vault is Andrew John Greenwidge
Fell into and drowned in a giant tank of raw sewage
The mourners to his funeral brought bunches of roses
And throughout the service held tightly their noses .
Written 16th April 2019.
For An Epitaph To make Us Laugh 2, Poetry Contest.
Sponsored by Jesse Rowe.
Written by
Gary Smith
Categories:
humorous,
Reginald Dodds
Here lies the bookie Reginald Dodds,
Trampled by a horse, what were the odds.
Entry for
An Epitaph to Make Us Laugh 2 Poetry Contest
Sponsored by Jesse Rowe.
11/4/19. Placed =1st.
Written by
Michael Ward
Categories:
fun, funny, hilarious, history, humor, nonsense, simile,
Silly Thoughts
Written by
Thvia Shetley
Categories:
funny,
Epitaph of a Run-Away Bride
Here lies a woman of hedonist fame,
her Je ne sais quoi had no restrain.
Any man who proposed
found her not so disposed
and never could find her again!
*
Written by
Jslambert Mister Roboto
Categories:
bereavement, betrayal, drink, giggle, heaven, hyperbole, obituary,
Machiavelli
Machiavelli s'been stewing
teardrops in the Soup
Stooping to new lows
for SYMPATHY
stirring chickens in the coop
Seems some folks will do anything
for what they think is fame
Swiss cheese stories for glory
Lordy! Whaddah' shame!
Reminds me of two classic movies...
"Freddie Lives" and the other is
"The Crying Game"...
but this one's very unbelievable, it ain't scary,
and it's much
MUCH more lame!~
Written by
Rudolph Rinaldi
Categories:
food, kids, funny, god, philosophy, religion, science,
The Newton Epitaph
Had a fig Newton
Dropped it on the floor
God said, Let Newton be!
And all was right.
Until the Ants
Written by
John Heck
Categories:
funny
Eggspiration Date - An Epitaph-Analogical Epigram
Sir Humpteath Dumpteath sateth on a wall
Poor Master Humpteath tooketh a great fall
Arsenic was foundeth in his coffee cup
Thus here resteths Humpteath - sunnyside UP!
For Thvia Shetley's contest:
Clever Analogies
Written by
Ryan Graham
Categories:
humor, money, poverty,
Broke
Here lies my wallet.
On my desk he sleeps.
His malnourished stomach’s
been empty for weeks.
No family survived him.
There is only me,
With no way to pay off
his burial fee.
Written by
Wendy M
Categories:
death of a friend, funeral, funny, humor, humorous,
Bye May
Here Lays May
Who was on her way
To a little old bar,
She was hit by a car.