Humorous and funny Cat poems and/or funny poems about Cat. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Cat funny poems!
Written by
Colleen Laforme
Categories:
funny, pets, cat, cat,
A Cat With a Knack
I have a cat
A real fat cat
My cat is all black
My black fat cat
It is a cat with a knack
A true fact about my cat
My fat black cat
She has a knack to catch a rat
My all black cat brought me the rat
This is why my cat is a fat black cat
So rats watch your back
From my cat with the knack
Or you will become a snack for my fat black cat
Written by
James Horn
Categories:
humorous,
From Life of a Cat
From Life of Cat
From life of a cat what can we learn?
Never have seen one wearing a sunburn
Our cat we do have that does exist
Seems to think he is a ventriloquist.
Took meow test and great grade he made;
To write poems even tried to persuade
Sweet and low chariot was met by a meow
And what I am about to learn no one knew.
In our house, cat has a humble place to live
Sufficient food and water to him, we will give
But when he wants to eat by himself alone
He likes ice cream served on a crunchy cone.
James Thesarious Hilarious Horn
So where is the cat poem contest at?
Written by
Robert Gorelick
Categories:
halloween, humor,
Cat Possessd
Cat Possessed
Mrs. River got a black cat named Mr. Right
The day her husband disappeared from sight
Now neighbors all shiver
Is Mr. Right—Mr. River?
And what spell might she cast Halloween night?
10/13/22
Written by
William Masonis
Categories:
funny, pets,
My Bed's Just Here For the Cat
Fatcat,
Hairy nuisance
Sprawling over bedsheets
Crowding limited sleepspace with
Blubber.
Written by
Jan Allison
Categories:
cat, humorous,
Feline Fine Footles
Tiddles didn’t like his new tinned tea
Fussy
Pussy
Angry Animal
Shows claws
From paws
Self catering cat
Catch mice
Tastes nice
Caught in the rain
Soggy
Moggy
Time for a sneaky sleep
Cat nap
On lap
Contented cat
Purry
Furry
March of the Footles Contest Sponsor Timothy Hicks
03~04~16
Written by
Seren Roberts
Categories:
funny,
My Bed the Synathroesmic Cat
oh lovely bed, dishevelled bed,
warm and cosy snuggle bed
too nice to get out of bed
too big for one it should be shared
crisp clean sheets, to curl the toes bed,
pack of pillows for my head.
duvet to wrap around me, bed
wish you served meals, need to be fed.
coffee and toast make it a special bed
crumbs to lie on, isn’t good it’s said
best you throw me out, get a shower,
oh bed, can I sneak back in an hour,
my bed I love you.
Penned 11th April 2013
Written by
Laura Breidenthal
Categories:
adventure, best friend, cat, crazy, cute love, friendship, funny,
Staircase Race
March 21, 2015
you shan't win
not this day my furry friend
watch me run
head start - yeah!
close to end he leaps down ledge
watch him fly
staircase race
wins and rubs it in my face
prissy proud prance
Written by
Glen Schwartz
Categories:
cat, children, fantasy, fun, humor,
The Tall Cat
I Do not want a window seat .
I do not want to freeze my feet..
I do not want a waiter cat .
I do not like his pin striped hat..
I do not want him to touch my food.
And how he speaks is down right Rude..
So won't you take my order Jerry.
I know the menu, and I'm in quite the hurry..
Scrapple , egg and cheese on toast,
that is the meal I love the most..
The tall cat can have his green eggs and ham.
He's not from Philly but Sam I Am..
Written by
Debra Squyres
Categories:
animal, cat, humorous,
Meow Meow
Here kitty, kitty. Come out and play
I have a new bow for you today
You tore the blue one out so quick
With angry paw…you seemed quite ticked!
I want to dress you and show you off
So all the other bows I now have tossed
No purple or green to match your eyes
Or orange, nor pink that you despise
Polk-a-dots were just not right for you
You tore them to shreds a time or two
No stripes or plaids are in my hand
For these I know you could not stand
The white one was lost in your white fur
When it came out you purred and purred
Here kitty, kitty, now don’t you tease
I’ve a red one here that’s sure to please
1/10/13
Written for “Hello Kitty (World)” members contest.
Written by
Jan Allison
Categories:
bird, cat, humorous,
Tweety Pie and Sylvester
Tweetie Pie
Knows Sylvester is sly
Of the cat he is wary
What a clever canary!
Sylvester
Will seethe and fester
When Tweety makes a mad dash
He exclaims 'suffering succotash!
Cleritoons Poetry Contest
Sponsored by Joseph May
09/05/21
Written by
Lycia Harding
Categories:
bird, cat, humorous, tree,
Bad Kitty - Birdie's
He listened for them in the wood
as daylight blossomed, poised to prowl
For breakfast, breast meat sounded good
and Cat could feel his stomach growl
Soon, struck by a cacophany
of cheeps and chirps, of coos and caws,
Cat snuck up on them, tree by tree
and hushed each cluck with teeth and claws
They paid no mind, so were plucked clean
from every nook where they would sing
but had they looked, they might have seen
him right behind them and took wing!
When Cat had eaten every bird,
he retched a ball of beaks and feet,
spat out one final bone and purred,
outstretched atop the spongey peet...
Written by
M. L. Kiser
Categories:
animal, cat, humor, pets, poems, poetry,
Sweet Slumber of Nip-Laden Dreams
Ah, sweet slumber of nip-laden dreams;
the milk of mother moon bestowed,
a blessed drink and lactose-free
to this mine humble, feline throat.
Running freely through outer space,
I touch upon thy blessed universe.
My home of emerald and lapis lace,
is where in I lay in furred repose.
Chasing neon rainbows in nebulae bright,
my dreams are filled with gold doubloons.
I’ll spend them on treats and nip-delight,
and chase away any greedy tycoons.
A feline black as obsidian night,
in a home filled with human love;
among the faeries and tree sprites,
mind flies just like the doves.
Written by
Jan Allison
Categories:
cat, humorous,
Tales of Tiddles
Tiddles didn’t really like the new cat food
Fussy
Pussy
The result of the new cat food
Tiddles
Piddles
BUT THEN ….
Squitty
Kitty
Tiddles returns from a long walk in the rain
Soggy
Moggy
Contented Cat when towel dried
Purry
Furry
Any theme two liner – March 2017 Standard Contest
Sponsored by Brian Strand
03~18~17
Written by
Caren Krutsinger
Categories:
cat, funny,
Shark, Cat Contortionist
Shark, the cat, is sitting catty-wampus today. He is a contortionist. His head is to the north,
His tail to the west, paws to the east, crossed in a southwesterly way, except for one which is
Somehow sticking up in the air like a lone feather. He is licking his Neverland region, as I step
Over him. At first when I noticed him on the porch, with all these extensions, I thought he was a
Fat, giant spider. Shark is an older cat, there is no way he should have this kind of agility, but
He does, and I am in awe.
Written by
Robert Gorelick
Categories:
cat, humor,
Kept Cat
Kept Cat
You called me your dream bird, now it's too late
We'd fly off in bliss, our purr-fect dream date
I deemed you my winner
you deemed me your dinner
How does it feel to be my kept cat, mate?
Written by
Janis Medders Tobechi
Categories:
cat, fun, humorous,
Catting
I walk toward you less and less,
cringe and hunch at your caress.
Outside oozes from your pores.
I steal my chance to get outdoors.
My eyes reflect the magic night.
Excitement bodes within my sight.
The winds of wildness set me free
on my first romantic spree.
My feline fancy, you’re the one.
In full moonlight we jump and run.
Lady, Lady, my sweet Lady
will you have my litter, Baby?
Where I live? It matters not.
Let’s enjoy, the time we’ve got.
I’m hanging loose, trying to be feral.
Oops just remembered, I’m fixed and sterile.
8/6/18 Marathon Mile 23 3rd Place
Written by
Ronald D Thompson
Categories:
cat, humorous, silly,
Hungry Cat
All I hear is 'kitty, kitty!’
Such a shame. Such a pity.
I want my food. That’s where I’m at.
After all, I’m just a cat!
Written by
Paula Goldsmith
Categories:
cat, giggle, rap, sleep, smile, uplifting, words,
The Cat Nursery Rhyme
Cat cat wear your cap,
Cat cat go catch a rat.
Cat cat paws to tap,
Cat cat can you rap?
Cat cat now take your nap.
Written by
Caren Krutsinger
Categories:
baby, grandchild, grandmother, grandparents, humor, humorous, relationship,
She Was Born With Cat Ears
She was born with cat ears.
So cute! Everyone lied.
Some of us felt them.
They were striped, and furry.
Odd for a human head.
Gray, pink in the middle.
“Adorable!” some of us said.
“Can they be removed?” the new grandmother asked.
Making her daughter-in-law her enemy for life.
Written by
John Lawless
Categories:
humor, word play,
Cat Nip
THEY GAVE THE CAT A TONIC.....NOW HE IS.
John G. Lawless
©5/8/2019
Written by
M. L. Kiser
Categories:
animal, cat, funny, nature, pets, poems, poetry,
Tp Trails
My toilet paper
regularly trots
out of the bathroom,
throughout the whole house,
no, it is not trained.
If it were trained
I am certain
it would proudly
stay nice and neat.
My cat walks
it every
single day;
Toilet
Paper
trails.
Written by
Janet Grace
Categories:
animal, cat, happiness, humorous,
Bad News Kittens
Kittens caper
Crinkle paper
To ruin the news
Wad it up
Bat and cuff
Bite and chew
Strike with claws
Shred with jaws
Rip to smithereens
No newspaper news
Today will be seen
Written by
Lisa Ricci
Categories:
cat, fun, humor,
Cats and Hats
my attempt at a simplistic limerick suite
thank you
"cats and hats"
I once went to the beach with hats
and noticed in the back seat were my cats
I couldn't leave them in the car
so we ended up sitting at the bar
later I placed them on cool mats
we stayed until the sun went down
in between they managed to be a clown
they nestled and played with my hats
in style as true diplomats
now for all it was a showdown
as our day was nearing end
we were happy and could not pretend
my cats were never alone
my love and patience had grown
but now my hats I need to mend
SkyWatcher
06-17-23
Written by
Robert Gorelick
Categories:
appreciation, cat, humor,
Mighty Mercury
Mighty Mercury
Alert then aloof, snuggly warm then colder
His rangy legs spring to hitch a ride on our shoulder
Lifting our hearts to elation
He’s our portable vacation
We cherish Mercury more each day we grow older
Written by
Panagiota Romios
Categories:
cat, humor,
Feline On the Town
Feline on the Town
8/21/2023
Tried to bathe cat in my kitchen sink,
She ran out the back door in a wink!
Kitty, my kitty,you are bad.
Too much beer you indeed had!
Here you recline in public,very stoned.
Taking you home right now, to atone!