Humorous and funny Business poems and/or funny poems about Business. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Business funny poems!
Written by
Duke Beaufort
Categories:
business, funny, holiday, philosophy, time,
December 21, 2012
The world as we know it will end!
This warning the Mayans did send
But yes there's still time
After reading this rhyme
To honor Black Friday and spend
Written by
David Kavanagh
Categories:
allusion, humorous, parody, word play,
Its a Risque Business
they closed the brothel
to open a bakery
tarts still lay around
black forests are on display
no fresh muffins ~ nothing’s changed
They Closed The Brothel Poetry Contest
Sponsored by: Kai Michael Neumann
14/02/2021/ syllable counter PS 5/7/5/7/7
Written by
Rico Leffanta
Categories:
business, humor,
Business As Usual
Rock Hardon just called a staff meeting
To hear a complaint about cheating
Our Xerox machine
Could not be wiped clean
So privates were publicly sheeting
Written by
Gershon Wolf
Categories:
business, car, health, humor,
Guaranteed Weight-Loss Program
Vast sums of money
enormous chunks of time
All spent on losing weight ~
usually ruined by dinnertime
It's really quite easy
now I know that sounds cheezy
But here's the one thing that works, brother
Sell your car today, and don't buy another
You'll walk everywhere
have little time to spare
for banquets and luncheons
or to lie around potato chip munchin'
And even if this radical step doesn't work
you have my personal guarantee
I'll sell your car back to you for what you took from me
~ sure enjoyed driving it for free
Written by
Anne-Lise Andresen
Categories:
business, crazy, hilarious,
- Greenland Is Not For Sale -
play monopoly
buy land and cities in cash _
... the game is over
23/08/2019
Sun :) - A-L Andresen :)
Copyright © All Rights Reserved
Written by
Dan Keir
Categories:
adventure, angel, beautiful, business, childhood, death, education, fantasy, farewell, freedom, friendship, funeral, funny, growing up, happiness, happy, health, holiday, home, hope, humorous, imagination, inspirational, nostalgia, on writing and words, parody, passion, patriotic, peace, people, philosophy, slam, social, song, sorrow, sorry, spiritual, time, woman,
Ding Dong the Wicked Witch Is Dead
Globally, miners jubilantly jump for joy
Smiles on the faces of every girl and boy
The grins of a newly opened Xmas toy
Thatcher’s dead.
Trade unionists bounce along the street
Music blaring and the tapping of feet
From nurses to Bobbies still on the beat
Thatcher’s dead.
Street parties announced in the nation
Satan who brought economic inflation
Is deceased, now’s the time for elation
Thatcher’s dead.
Its times like this I’m sad I’m an atheist
And can only shout and wave my fist
And then go to the pub and get pissed
Thatcher’s dead.
Written by
John Posey
Categories:
business, fantasy, funny, imagination, retirement,
Haiku Shoppe
Great idea here
Let’s open a Haiku Shoppe
They go great with beer
Easy to find I’m told
They hide under nibs of pens
Don’t let them get old
To make a great stew
Take a limerick or two
Mix well with Haiku
If all has gone well
And your mix has turned out right
You’re ready to sell
One more thing to do
We must put them on a bun -
Sit and have a few
Written by John Posey
12/22/12
Written by
Duke Beaufort
Categories:
allegory, business, funny, health, imagination, mystery, parody, science,
Voldemort, By Contrast, Was Vanquished Easily
Changed climate is not a surprise
With drilling for gas on the rise
Where can life forms hide
From carbon dioxide
And methane let loose in the skies?
Neo-druids auger gas wells
And add fluids with sulfurous smells!
Are poisons they've tapped
With their magic wands trapped
Evermore by sorcerous spells?
Votes and news seem not relevant
The unrelenting elephant
In all our best rooms
Is fossil fuel's fumes
And toxins we can't circumvent
Written by
Dan Keir
Categories:
adventure, angst, autumn, business, confusion, dark, dedication, depression, fear, grief, growing up, happiness, happy, hate, health, home, hope, humorous, imagination, inspirational, introspection, journey, life, lonely, loss, lost, love, on work and working, pain, parody, people, relationship, retirement, sad, satire, school, social, stress, success, sympathy, time, work,
Reflections: Midlife Crisis
P aranoia permeates, etching itself into your fractured face,
A cacophony of constant pressure; life remains a stressful race,
N othing to hope for, no positives like promotion in the workplace,
I nability to love, relationships lift anchor and set sail without chase,
C hildren crushing dreams under mortgages; age grows with disgrace
!!
Written by
Robert A. Dufresne
Categories:
funny
Irs Business Audit
There was a madam who had a business in Shire,
In the oldest profession, she was for hire,
Alas, the tax people came,
But she didn’t think the same,
Because soon she wanted to retire.
She cried, “I have no savings; surely you jest,
Even the IRS can’t tax my breasts!
I just had them installed!
Aren’t you enthralled?
I bet you would never even guess!”
"Madam, even though your 401k,
Is in your ample breasts to stay,
I can see by your guests,
It still generates interest,
And for that you’ll have to pay!"
Written by
Sharon Smith
Categories:
business, funny, parody, song-
Logistics - a Parody of a Certain Delivery Company's Television Advert, To the Tune That's Amore
Yes we don’t give a toss,
If your package is lost,
That’s logistics,
If it’s broken or bent,
Or has multiple dents,
That’s logistics,
If it’s fragile and breaks,
It was not our mistake,
That’s logistics,
Well you were not at home,
So we sent it to Rome,
That’s logistics!
So incredibly late,
That it’s gone out of date,
That’s logistics,
We don’t know where it went,
Are you sure it was sent?
That’s logistics,
Your parcels we’ll stash,
But we’ll still take your cash,
That’s logistics,
What an item on time?!
Oh no wait, it’s not mine,
That’s logistics!
Written by
Charlie Murder
Categories:
business, funny, girlfriend-boyfriend, romance, slam, war, nice, me, nice,
Im Just Gonna Snap Okay Get Over It
i dont care who you are
or what you think of me
build me up and break me down
then take your "stuff"* and flee
i hate you
you know it too
so bring it to my plate
take a point and hold my ground
to not spew all my hate
you were so nice in the beginning
well, what the "heck"* are you now?
gone, love, thats what you are
a filthy ugly cow
i am still the nice guy
lord, you have said so much worse
and still im here, i still get by
a blessing, not a curse.
i didnt snap hard enough to say what i meant
Written by
Volodymyr Knyr
Categories:
business, funny, humorous, jobs, success, work,
The Best Job
Your own successful biz,
that's what your best job is!
Volodymyr Knyr
2014
Written by
Cheryl Hoffman
Categories:
business, humor,
Pioneer Woman
Tough broads with long skirts moving out west,
circling wagons never getting any rest,
now I'm on tv,
wrangling up recipes,
plus sell house wares that are simply the best!
12-11-16
Written by
Iolanda Scripca
Categories:
funny, husband,
Woman-Owned Business Maker
Self-employed and partner in life
He "hired" some other guy's wife
Making golfing balls
Now he has two holes
My new business ?...Surgical Knives...
for Carolyn Devonshire's "Horrible Bosses"
Written by
Duke Beaufort
Categories:
business, funny, politicaleaster,
October, 1582
The Julian calendar threw
Spring’s equinox path far askew
But Gregory’s shift
Of ten days closed the rift
So Easter eggs roll now on cue
Written by
Duke Beaufort
Categories:
allegory, angel, business, funny, humorous, peace, war,
Hark--An Angel--The Harbinger of All Things Good
What flies though the air up above
Disguised as a peace seeking dove
For those who've not heard
Drones can send you the bird
From the land of brotherly love
Author's note: Is this really how to win friends and influence people (for the long term)?
Written by
Brenda Mcgrath
Categories:
beautiful, business, humorous, sexy,
The Receptionist
The receptionist smiled and captivated the room.
Her beauty and curves made the men swoon.
She was all business when she talked,
But they forgot about business when she walked…
Written by
Terry Reeves
Categories:
beautiful, business, cool, fishing, girl, humor, imagination,
Nails
My nails grow longer in the heat,
I like to keep them short, hands and feet,
pedicure and manicure by the girls in Phuket,
they give you more, full service and yet . . . .
I don't need my shoulders or head massaged,
there's a slap on the back as their fingers emerged,
nothing too intimate otherwise I might get ********,
the personal service should be my selection.
Now there's a mask on my face, an extra they say,
don't worry, it's free, you won't have to pay,
I'm not too keen on cucumber, peer over the edge,
shouldn't be so fussy, after all it's a privilege.
I walk out of the shop, spent my last Thai coin,
can't help but notice - there's a swelling in my groin.
Written by
Katherine Stella
Categories:
business, funny, imagination, inspirational, life, people, places, visionary, work,
Miss Priss
< once there was a boss we called miss priss
like to give orders with snap of wrist
file fax make coffee
phones radio golly
when not looking I blow her big hiss
Written by
Duke Beaufort
Categories:
business, funny, humorous, science,
Chelyabinsk
A hot opportunity knocks
Buy and sell incoming space rocks
We love asteroids
But are covered by Lloyds
In case our own blocks suffer shocks
Written by
Rudolph Rinaldi
Categories:
business, death, funeral, funny, home, life, work,
The Crowds
the crowds taking the subways
enter the underground
below upon waking
to rise up
to work
in the clouds above
only to go back in the evening
down through the underground
low upon leaving
to home
to family
to final rest
in the underground
or in the clouds above
Written by
Duke Beaufort
Categories:
allegory, business, funny, humorous, satire, social, time,
Tone It Down To ''At Least For the Duration''
Time does our earth presence sever
But the post office is clever
And offers for sale
For its eternal mail
A stamp that is good forever
Author's note: The idea that anything associated with this planet will be consumed "forever" is peculiar and laughable. It is also destructive in that business holds the truth in shadows.
Written by
Mark Toney
Categories:
business, happy, humorous, poetry, water, word play,
Chasing Unicorns
Unicorn float stuck
Unicorn startups' luck
Written by
Donald J Bennett
Categories:
business, funny, hope, words,
Garage Sale Special
For sale a bunch of fine unused words, many misspelled
Poet can’t uses them; mind is on strike, the pen has been stilled
These words never used for they never quite seemed to fit
Got them online; advertisement said they were a complete poetry kit
Can’t send them back because I did use a few; the remainder unused
Selling at half price; many are funny words which will leave you amused