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Funny Poems About Black African American
Humorous and funny Black African American poems and/or funny poems about Black African American. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Black African American funny poems!
Written by
Skat A
Categories:
abuse, funny, husband, me,
Black and Blue
BLACK and BLUE
Today I wonder,
Wonder why?
You hit me in the eye,
you made me cry.
My eyes are brown,
Now they're black and blue.
Is that what I get for loving you?
My lips are pink, now they're bloody red.
Is that what I get!!!
Do you wish I were dead?
My teeth are white,
I just lost three,
Is that what I get over a little fight?
I see a smile underneath,
I see you leaving with the police.
I finally got rid of you.
I can't believe I waited,
UNTIL I WAS BLACK AND BLUE.
SK
NOTE: True story, I finally did the right thing and called the cops
Written by
Celeste Butler-Mendez
Categories:
funny, love
Black Magic Hearts
What underhanded monkey business
razzle-dazzle bull is this?
Whose double-crossing, flimflam scam,
debauchery or hocus sham
is wheeling dealing in romance,
putting lovers in a trance?
Antics, capers or witch's brew,
enchanting hymns or shaman's stew,
whose quackery or voodoo drink
made Casanova stop and think
and turned the ancient lovers cold;
poor Romeo and nymphs of old?
Perhaps black magic's potent gel,
or craftiness or wicked spell,
a clever con or master hoax,
or just some trickster playing jokes.
Whatever ruse that works the arts,
mumbo jumbo seduces hearts!
Written by
Tim Ryerson
Categories:
funny,
Black-Water Blues
Diz Cajonne dey call Thibodaux
Paddle dis girl in his Pirogue
Den he see dem unmention
Dad tool stan at attention
She slap him stick HARD doncha' know
Dad pole shrink awful fas he yell whoa!
Sha, whad did you swat dad ting fo?
Now it at parade rest
Like diz bird in a nest
She-say-"I-scared-a'-dem-SNAKE-buddy-ohh!"
PD's contest
Written by
Jan Allison
Categories:
fun, humorous, tribute, , cute,
Cute Black Bear
Cute black bear has a perfect behind
and her manicured paws are so kind
When she sits on a chair
all the male bears just stare -
her sheer beauty, it just blows their mind!
A friend has given me a little black bear as a replacement for the soft toy we used to have in my husband’s car – I hope she lasts as long as our old ‘guard dog’!
https://www.poetrysoup.com/poem/farewell_old_friend_888761
05~15~17
Written by
Janice Canerdy
Categories:
crazy, desire, humor,
Black Friday
I won’t shop Black Friday
because I’m not ready
to fend for my life
in a scene rough and heady.
So call me a coward!
You won’t see me fight ‘em,
and risk getting maimed
for a much-desired item.
Date: November 28, 2019
Contest Title: McWhirtle Me
Sponsor: Charles Messina
Written by
Jan Allison
Categories:
christmas, humorous,
Black Friday
Bargains galore!
Lots of people out shopping
All looking for that special gift
Carrier bags bulging
Keep an eye on the spending
Frazzled tempers
Riots break out
I got the LAST one
Don’t ever want to go shopping again
All I want is to go home
Yipee ... only 365 days till we do it all over again!!!
Jan Allison
27th November 2014
Written by
Malcolm Dyer
Categories:
art, black african american, fantasy, funny, life
Turning 40
oh no here it comes
that big barrel that big gun
i will not go yet
Written by
Jslambert Mister Roboto
Categories:
black african american, funny, people, social, uplifting, urban
Juicy Kaboosey
her derriere
in the air high
eyes wearing out
Than-Bauk written for Rick Parise's contest
Written by
Paul Geiger
Categories:
humorous,
Black Bart
Black Bart the PO8
Robbed Wells Fargo in Cal state
His lifestyle—his fate
Claimed his poetry
Not his robbery should have
Jailed him…snobbery
Written by
Chukwuemeka Mbah
Categories:
black african american, caregiving, courage, funny, grief, humorous
Pointing Fingers
You are one of the reasons
Why they inflate their quote
If you had seized the seasons
Good men could have had your vote
You are one of the reasons
Why our sweet land has gone sour in waste
Here is one of your multiple treasons
You aid corruption just to suit your taste
You are one of the reasons we wedge weighty wrath
Bombs daily detonate like fickle fireworks far north
You decided to do nothing but shut your mouth
So they took our weary sail south
You are one of the reasons the land is inflicted with rape
Overflowing in abundance yet you mong like a greedy ape
Alas our land is grey and old but not due
And it hurts me to know that I am also you.
Written by
Charles Hice
Categories:
education, family, children, funny,
Little Black Sambo
Little Black Sambo
Dance Sambo Dance!
You knoe you are a pancake!
The little black sambo ran around the tigers,
until they blended into batter.
Ewe see it does it matters.
Dance Sambo Dance!
You knoe you are a pancake!
If you even make just one mistake,
the tigers they will eat you.
Dance Sambo Dance!
You knoe you are a pancake!
Unless you can out race them,
the tigers are so fast.
We would rather that you eat them.
Dance Sambo Dance!
Prance and add the butter to the better batter there.
What could also be much better so much neater.
Dance Sambo Dance!
The tigers are just pancakes.Sambo is the eater.
Sambo Danced.
Written by
Muhammad Safa Thajudeen
Categories:
color, community, confusion, humorous, men,
Black Ink
Snow like my skin,
In white paper black ink!
Written by
Iris E. Sankey- Lewis
Categories:
appreciation, art, beauty, culture, discrimination, humorous
They Hate the Color Black
They, the blind
Heavy laden with mystery of denial
Empty of eclectic views
Yearns for Island of blinding white light.
They hate the color black
Every woman's sexy black dress
Every man's spotless black tuxedo
Every child's mem'ry of a clean blackboard.
They hate the color black
Black American history, mighty as Montenegro
Bleach cannot blot out its strength.
They hate the color black
Face the Sun!
Hold a conversation on equatorial black
Black rain clouds cleansing, hydrating, renewing.
They hate the color black
Black, the night, showing starlight
Black ink on sheets of white
Black the beginning and end of life -
They hate the color black.
*
Written by
Ceasia White
Categories:
black african american, funny, girlfriend-boyfriend, introspection, song-urban,
The Black Mistress
Black Mistress
That's what I'm suppose to be
Oh, no not me
I'm not coming second to another woman
No woman is coming before me
Black Mistress
That's what I'm suppose to be
Come get your clothes if you can't spend the holidays with me
You live with her not me
Black Mistress
You want to buy my love when you want please
Oh, no not me
I have my own and I'm not selling my goods to no one but I'm still not cheap
Written by
Mel Brake
Categories:
autumn, black african american, black love, cute love, funny love, i miss you
Love Like a Rose
Love is like a rose
Like the fibonacci frequency
Perfect geometry in all its curved lines
Love is like a rose
Like the shape of the heart
Filled with satisfaction and passion and love
Love is like the sweet smell of the rose
Like a romance that said what is the good smell
When your car needs to be cleaned
Written by
Brenda Mcgrath
Categories:
food, humorous,
Black-Eyed Peas and Cornbread
Lately I have lost my usually healthy appetite.
My taste buds have gone on vacation, and fail to excite.
Hamburgers, chicken, and seafood leave me cold.
Maybe it’s my menu that has grown old.
I step on the scales thinking surely I have lost weight,
But it stubbornly remains the same, despite how little I ate.
Today I’m cooking something different to tempt my appetite that is dead.
I’m cooking Southern style, with black-eyed peas, ham, and cornbread.
Written by
Carolyn Devonshire
Categories:
funny, science fiction
Men In Black
Who are these notorious grim-faced men
Government spies, aliens, perhaps Satan
What color shows the real you?
Pray it is a brighter hue!
Just please don’t put on that black suit again
Written by
Kewayne Wadley
Categories:
black african american, fun, funny, silly,
Tortoise and the Hare
If a turtle could.
He would walk faster- maybe.
Find some dynamite.
Written by
Gypsyof Essence
Categories:
funny, humorous,
Black Jack
Black Jack dealers
Counting money
Dealing the cards
Effortlessly,
Taking all my money!!!!
Written by
Diona Finley
Categories:
black african american, childhood, funny, life, mother, teen
Black Mama
Child if you don't get yo nappy head;
Imma give you something to cry about.
Get yo butt over here.
Say one mo thang.
Ima beat the black off of ya.
Wait til i'm finish.
I bet not hear another word.
It'll hurt me more than It'll hurt you.
You act up here, I'ma act with you.
Im aint chasing after you.
I put you in this world I sho nuff can take you out.
That's a black mama.
Written by
Deborah Burch
Categories:
funny, nature, romance, satire,
Black Widow--Trochee
Black Widow
We made love in the arbour
And loft--out of sight,
Then three times at the harbour
As the day turned night.
Let's go into the parlour
In the candle light,
There's no more time for ardour.
I'm ready to--Bite!
©Deborah Burch
5/08/2012
Trochee
a/b/a/b
7/5/7/5
*Note: the black widow spider is known for killing and eating her male counterpart after she has exhausted him from all the 'love making'--mating.
Written by
Jslambert Mister Roboto
Categories:
animals, funny, girlfriend-boyfriend, husband, life, nature
Black Widow
She's got a plan
just moved to Florida
one week in the hole
a forced proposal...
"yeah...
uh...
maybe if I get a job with insurance;
we'll get married...
then you'll have insurance too!"
a bribe
the spider web is officially constructed
"Charlotte's web"
no...we'll name it
the Black Widow!
Written by
Asif Andalib
Categories:
animals, childhood, funny, life, nature,
The Black Sheep
We had a black sheep
He used to follow us to school
He was such a fan!
Written by
Katherine Braithwaite
Categories:
anxiety, art, humor, humorous, hyperbole,
The Black Cat
The sky is stark, the air is cool and still
The black cat’s run, the birds unfold all day
I sit down here and with my totty pray
Ye cast o’ foolish thoughts, you raped my will.
We’ve each enraged the bureaucratic mill.
Oh frigid purse, I never meant to pay!
The sky ‘s a-spark, the air is warm and shrill
The saturnine demoted knelled their way
With this feathered pounce, my sample quill,
I cite the cheque and date it for next May.
Oh, tit for cat, the tiger’s bed ‘s astray.
Yer life is settled by a harlot’s will
The sky ‘s a shark, the air is sharper still.
Written by
Ayesha Karim
Categories:
black african american, care, caregiving, child, childhood, giggle
Mama
Mama
I was only five years old,
getting my hair pressed for the first time.
I heard my mother’s voice.
She was reading to me as she was pressing my hair.
Mama always called me “my-Esha”.
She was so kind a woman.
She still is.
All the people I knew as friends called me Esha.
My family did too.
Mama would wash my hair and then press it.
The pressing comb would get very hot.
The sides would singe with steam and heat from the pressing comb.
The back of my hair was my least favorite part to get pressed.
She knew it and we joked about it when she was threw fixing my hair.