Humorous and funny Anxiety poems and/or funny poems about Anxiety. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Anxiety funny poems!
Written by
Arthur Vaso
Categories:
angst, anxiety, art, friendship, humorous, imagery,
Friends
They love you
When you defend them
They run
When you need a helping hand
Real ones are there in total silence
Called the silent ones
To massage the pain
Inside
Of a wounded soul
They were there long ago
They are there now in the snow
Holding hands
Never letting go
Friends
Wiping tears
Striking fears
Praying for good cheer
Please me lord
Serve me one more beer
Written by
Cheryl Hoffman
Categories:
anxiety, death, humor, money,
Death and Taxes
Now that I'm dead I can finally relax,
worry free of April 15th and filing my income tax.
3-22-17
Written by
David Brown
Categories:
anxiety, dark, depression, humor, image,
Viral
Thoughts
and
feelings
on a
downward
spiral,
now
that's
what's
truly,
going
viral
Written by
Arthur Vaso
Categories:
anxiety, funny, hilarious, humor, leadership, perspective,
Facebook Conversation
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Written by
Michael Wise
Categories:
anxiety, conflict, humor,
The Valley of Indecision
Lost in the valley of indecision
Forever caught between here and there
My mind is divided, my soul is torn
And monstrous phantoms are everywhere
There's neither light, nor is there darkness
Here in this barren oasis of grey
Trapped somewhere in between questions and answers
Groping and grasping to find my way
I'll lose my mind if I go on performing
This balancing act between madness and death
A stand is needed for yea or for nay
Or else very soon I may draw my last breath
Deciding that I cannot make a decision
Embracing the madness instead of this yoke
The phantoms encroaching, I suddenly jumped up
And out of this horrible nightmare I woke
© Mike Wise
9/17/14
Written by
Aby M'Baye
Categories:
africa, anxiety, desire, growth, humor, love, remember,
Feel Free
Make as you feel it
In the sense of your feel
Without forgetting sense
Fais comme tu le sens
Dans le sens de tes sens
Sans oublier le sens
Aby M.
Written by
Romeo Naces
Categories:
age, analogy, anxiety, culture, funny love, humor,
Dangling Contemplation
What's a necktie
dangling for?
Too stiff, too thin
to be scarf, a bib
or an apron,
Too smooth to be
a hankie,
too short to be
a suicide noose
to contemplate on!
Written by
James Edward Lee Sr.
Categories:
adventure, anxiety, caregiving, engagement, funny love, grandmother, grandson,
Affected Art Baby Sitter-
Flickered fingers;
Can't dial ringers;
Telephone calls;
Babies cry and crawls;
what do you do?
what do you do?
When their diapers fall?...
6/8/20
written words by James Edward Lee Sr.©2020
Written by
B. Andrew Kelly
Categories:
allegory, anxiety, funny, life, silly, surreal,
Ballad for the Wacky Waving Inflatable Tube-Man
air rockets skyward
uppercutting inside
plastic neon flesh
contorting at inhuman angles
what does my body language spell?
ankles anchored into the Earth
to stay grounded as the wave
of time and space crashes
a flood of stagnant flux
there is a symphony of bones
snapping and cracking
in twisted orchestrations
the act of existing for me
is a resilient demonstration
Written by
Timothy Hicks
Categories:
anxiety, bereavement, courage, fear, humor, loneliness, nature,
Is Humanity That Bad
"Is humanity that bad?" pondered the lighthouse keeper, frightened with the sea
Written March 27th, 2016
For the See or Feel Contest Hosted by Poet Destroyer
Placed 2nd
Written by
Robert Candler
Categories:
age, anxiety, celebrity, culture, giggle, growing up, hyperbole,
Adolescent Lamentations
Headline: "Bieber jailed."
And you tell me there's a God?
I won't sleep. Will you?
Written by
Kim Merryman
Categories:
anxiety, funny, sick,
Oh Me, Oh My
Oh me! Oh my!
I think I'm going to die!
I bumped my head,
I'll soon be dead!
Oh me, oh me, oh my!
Oh dear! Oh dear!
I know my end is near!
I coughed, I sneezed,
and then I wheezed!
Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear!
What's that you say?
I'm going to be okay?
You haven't heard
a single word.
I'm at death's door today!
(This is a parody of someone I know who gets overly dramatic
when she doesn't feel well)
6/16/15
Written by
Peter Lewis Holmes
Categories:
anxiety, funny, humorous,
An Intimate Itch
A certain itch it’s like no other,
descending as Vesuvious burning
tyre, a nuee ardente of fire
Manouver all you will, to no
sweet avail; it’s your hand
that’s needed, no matter what
audience papers the house
Yes, a magazine or folded coat
can often shield the work required,
but please, no sighs or muted
cries desired
Then good performance must
transpire, to shift the well-placed
hand from view
And when the fire is doused, as such,
and all one’s thoughts removed from
crotch
Reflect on how you saved the day,
with folded coat on nuts in May
Written by
Michael Wegman
Categories:
anxiety, appreciation, conflict, courage, culture, dedication, funny,
Sour Grapes
The teen’s face beamed with pride in his new car,
But Bestie exploded in jealous rage.
His reluctant congrats, a lame sidebar;
“I’d simply rather walk”— framed his outrage.
On Friday she failed the entrance exam,
Going to college, now holds no desire,
Higher education—a real flimflam,
she declared, all she’d felt now a fool’s pyre.
Excuses shirk blame—we can all decry,
Winning is fun, but losing kills yearning;
Life isn’t perfect—things do go awry,
But disparagement isn't good learning!
Be strong and just—suck it up when you lose.
Raisins are just sour grapes—with a bruise.
August 19, 2018
Written by
Jaquay Atkins
Categories:
addiction, anniversary, anxiety, art, baby, beautiful, beauty, blessing, boyfriend, class, confidence, conflict, desire, destiny, devotion, education, environment, faith, fantasy, fate, feelings, for her, fun, funny love, future, giggle, girlfriend, happiness, heart, heaven, life, light, loneliness, lonely, lost, lust, magic, strength, stress, sweet love, symbolism,
I Love You
Often, I have uttered these words to myself
Your feminity has entranced my manhood
My vision is focused on your subject matter
A quick study of a woman's psychology
I feel you with my mind, and touch you with my eyes
Senses are heightened in your very presence
Soon, I will utter the ultimate words of encouragement
Constant admiration for your hidden strengths
Instant chemistry between us has changed our biology
Soon, I will hold you tight and recite the following;
Baby, I love you
Written by
Jerry T Curtis
Categories:
allusion, anxiety, dedication, humorous, inspiration, passion, psychological,
My Plan
This Is My Plan
Now that things are quiet
Heavy hitters hanging low
It's time to post my bestest poems
And let my talent show
I see Deb, Lin and Andrea
Are keeping kinda still
So,I might make it up that list
Where I can show my skill
My eye is on those top three spots
But, before I reach my goal
I'll have to go through Ninty-seven
Poets in a row
But seeing no one, is around
I don't know how I'll miss
To get my poem on the Top
Of The Hundred All-Time List
Written by
Diane Lefebvre
Categories:
anxiety, death, evil, grave, humor,
Fearful Things
I walked on by a graveyard, very late, alone one night.
No ghosts sprung from their moldy graves: no evil ghoulish sights.
It seemed no vampires lurked about, to sip my blood like wine.
And any hulking werewolves must have previously dined.
I watched in vain for zombies, with their gruesome, bloody stares.
But they seemed to be as plentiful, as wayward teddy bears.
Yet, I would duck behind a tree, on guard quite through and through,
At every car that passed me by . . transporting who knows who?
While I recalled what mother said, no doubt with some misgiving:
It’s not the dead you have to fear . . but watch out for the living!
© 2015 Diane Lefebvre
Written by
Solomon Ochwo-Oburu
Categories:
anxiety, beauty, emotions, first love, funny love, girlfriend, imagery,
Your Sweet Face
Eva’s daughter, listen
Remove the blanket
Of dark and angry clouds
That covers your sweet face
Let the sun shine on your face
And let Adam’s handsome son
Harvest your delicious smiles
From your sweet face
That kills, kills the souls
Of many
With sweetness
And wild imagination
Written by
Jerry T Curtis
Categories:
anxiety, humor, psychological, stress,
Newsing and Boozing
There's a virus going around
And people getting sick
Some are even dying
From a germ, that they can't kick
There's an asteroid, it's flying
on it's undetected path
Aiming for the earth
To just unleash its wrath
chorus
There's a million things they tell you,
design to cause you fear
So, just relax and have another beer
There are terrorist, they say, came home to roost
Others over seas are busy buying Nukes
The end of the world, could be happening today
If it isn't now, it's likely on it's way
chorus
There's a million things they tell you,
design to cause you fear
So, just relax and have another beer
Written by
Richard Breese
Categories:
anxiety, england, flying, funny, humor, humorous, london,
flying dutchman
once a pilot from london
always carried an onion
but when he would speak
his flight crews would freak
so now he brings a bourbon.
Written by
Katherine Braithwaite
Categories:
anxiety, art, humor, humorous, hyperbole,
The Black Cat
The sky is stark, the air is cool and still
The black cat’s run, the birds unfold all day
I sit down here and with my totty pray
Ye cast o’ foolish thoughts, you raped my will.
We’ve each enraged the bureaucratic mill.
Oh frigid purse, I never meant to pay!
The sky ‘s a-spark, the air is warm and shrill
The saturnine demoted knelled their way
With this feathered pounce, my sample quill,
I cite the cheque and date it for next May.
Oh, tit for cat, the tiger’s bed ‘s astray.
Yer life is settled by a harlot’s will
The sky ‘s a shark, the air is sharper still.
Written by
David Smith
Categories:
anxiety, beautiful, education, father daughter, growing up, horror, humor,
Hopes For My Daughters
I have two daughters beautiful and smart,
I knew that from the start.
Equality with men
I know is important to them.
I just hope they are not in a hurry
To marry.
As I don't know many men who can be
Right 50 percent of the time like me.
And if they by chance marry some swine,
Will they have to share their jail time.
Written by
Jill Spagnola
Categories:
anxiety, children, kids, funny, humorous,
Funny Kids, Daze
^
Kids Funny (Senryu – Style) Daze
Waking state affects my day
Riding my bike to the rack`
I lock it safely at school
Sit with my clique
Tummy does a flip
Study Hall, yay a rest for my head
I look down clutching my teddy bear
Drooling on my desk in only my underwear!
Morning alarm buzzes~
BEEP!
Sunshine Williams
Team PoetrySoup
Funny Kids Poem contest
10/13/2015
Written by
Gary Bovett
Categories:
humorous,
Performance Anxiety
I may be no linguistic superstar
Or bachelor,master, doctor of languages
But i'll have you know
I've performed my works on many occasions
To cats, dogs, trees and miscellaneous flora
All of whom showed quiet
Appreciation
And genuine interest
In what I had to say
I have shouted rhymes and
Metaphors
At the top of my voice
To the inside of my house
While every piece of furniture
Sat motionless in awe
Rehearsed countless conversations
Loudly
While riding bicycle
Through quiet spectacular landscapes
Magnificent mountains
Stood high in silence
Listening to every word
Offering quiet encouragement
Written by
A.O. Taner
Categories:
anxiety, beautiful, betrayal, change, cheer up, cool, creation, deep, destiny, drink, emotions, fate, feelings, first love, friend, friendship, funny love, grief, hope, how i feel, humanity, humor, humorous, i love you, i miss you, imagination, innocence, inspiration, lonely, lost love, love, miss you, missing, missing you, motivation, passion, poetry, relationship, romance, romantic, sad love,
Bar
love walks into a bar
sees hope drinkin' it away;
what's wrong, love asks
nothing's wrong, hope replies,
nothing is wrong...
love turns to fate the bartender
and orders two shots of everything.