Humorous and funny Alien poems and/or funny poems about Alien. Read, share, and enjoy these hilarious Alien funny poems!
Written by
Black Eyed Susan
Categories:
funny, humorous, journey, poems,
Poems For My Alien Abductors: a Ride Into Space
I thought I could wow them with poems from earth
Poems of joy and humor, poems extolling it’s worth
So I laid out poems from Michael, Gail, and me
From Andrea, David, Gwen, and Ilene
From PD, Harry, Mandy, and Chris
From Jack, Craig, Cyndi, and Liz…
For I was sure once they read our beautiful works
They would embrace us and love our humanly quirks!
So last night I taped them all over my skin
Knowing they’d find them if they took me again…
When I woke up, they were gone and I had a reply:
“We enjoyed reading those poems last night,
And thanks for the names of the earthlings too -
We have many more experiments to do!”
2/7/13
For Michael's boomerang...send your poem for a ride contest
Written by
Randy Johnson
Categories:
funny, wife,
My Wife Is An Alien
(This is a fictional poem)
My wife is an alien and this morning she laid an egg.
She may be green but she has a great pair of legs.
She has two large antennas that are on her head.
She's smarter than Einstein but she's lousy in bed.
The egg will hatch next month and when it does, we'll have a little tyke.
It will be half human and half alien, I'm scared of what it will look like.
My wife is ugly and people usually scream after they've seen her.
We just got in a big fight over finances and she bit off my wiener.
We were deeply in love but now she's my foe.
If an alien proposes to you, you'd better say no.
Written by
Dan Keir
Categories:
adventure, courage, freedom, funny, hate, history, home, hope, humorous, journey, life, lonely, lost, patriotic, peace, people, places, political, space, travel, visionary,
Alien-Nation
One more alien... an extra terrestrial. Bloody foreigners.
Written by
Andrea Dietrich
Categories:
funny
An Alien Observation of Cell Phone Use
A Martian spy from the earth fled
and to his superiors said,
“Although no one is near,
they still talk hand to ear.
Too much oxygen’s gone to their head.”
For Carolyn Devnoshire's contest: Out of this world limericks
Written by
Jan Allison
Categories:
humorous,
Alien Invasion - For Contest
Two martians they landed on earth
Most earthlings gave them a wide berth
A photo was taken
The image is makin’
a fortune - just think of its worth!
Contest Write with the wit of Twain – Andrea Dietrich
06~19~15
If they had not landed there would be some reason for celebrating the fact.
Mark Twain
Written by
John Williams
Categories:
children, funny, space,
Alien Danger
Granger was in danger,
An alien landed in his yard,
So he slimed him with his slime-gun,
The alien running hard.
The alien jumped into his rocket ship
And pulled the portals down,
He blasted into space
With a great big alien frown.
Granger told his parents,
They just laughed and shook their heads,
That is until they saw the scorch marks,
Just near the old chook sheds.
Written by
Charmaine Chircop
Categories:
funny
Alien In Atmosphere Goes Human...
Little green creature,curious and ingenius,
left his space craft to catch a lady Venus,
she touched his chest!
he grabbed her breast!
Sex time- No Adam's Mac pack,Green Alien
invidious.
Not for the contest but tnks.
Caroline Devonshire,for the inspiration :)
Written by
Jimmy Anderson
Categories:
funny
Alien Stripper
There once was a man from deep space.
Who wanted a woman to chase.
His space ship was blimpy
Her clothes were too skimpy.
So they didn't get to first base!
Written by
Tom Higgins
Categories:
friendship, funny, imagination,
Alien Encounter
The likelihood of seeing,
a non terrestrial, intelligent, thinking being,
greeting you with a friendly wave,
and announcing that his name is Dave,
and asking you to take him to your leader.
Is about as possible as hearing,
that the day is actually nearing,
when equality and fairness,
replace the general, couldn't care less
attitude, which today is prevalent,
and which is really quite malevolent.
What do you think dear reader?
Written by
Barbara Washington
Categories:
funny, life, crazy,
An Alien From My Mothers Womb
I live in a world unlike the norm
Running alongside the usual
The wild and crazy having fun
I’m subdued watching on
I wonder what folks think
Behind bright eyes
Am I the crazy one?
An alien from my mothers womb
I find it thrilling to run with the horde
Though my course is contrary to the crowd
Like an alien from mothers womb
I hide away from the custom
Like a UFO hovering to observe
I wish to know the ways of the herd
Like the mind of the Martian
I wish to grasp the why of the wild and crazy
While the norm hide away from the crazy one
The crazy one seeks out the norm
Written by
John Fenn
Categories:
childhood, family, fantasy, food, children, funny
Alien Recipe
Cauliflower, coal dust, coriander, cumin
These are all the things you need
To make your baby human
Eat in moderation, and remember please refrain
From exceeding Daily limits
Or you’ll addle baby’s brain
Written by
Sandra Byrd
Categories:
childhood, funny, seasons, space, halloween, , cute,
Alien Queen
it,s halloween
my canteen is full of caffeine
my cuisine is green jelly beans filled with vaccine
i,m a alien queen trying to fit into earth,s,s tight
belly button jeans hope the paramedics are on site
if i make any sudden moves
what a confusing scene
i,m so betwichen cute and bewitching mean
earth,s little beast are pitching
me on a time machine sending me
far far away oh what a scream to miss the candy bar feast
what a bad dream
this alien queen won,t cry just grab
my canteen and jelly bean sack fly away
but you earthly beast better beware i will be back
to try once again
see you soon just look at the moon
next halloween day
Written by
Matt Caliri
Categories:
funny, science fiction
Alien Race
There they go!
Flying through the air!
Hundreds of them!
In different colors! Everywhere!
Red ship, blue ship, three ship four!
Who will win? When will it end?
I can't bear to look anymore!
Into the bunker we'll jump.
Darkness for weeks
Sitting rump-to-rump.
'Till the damned Zydeco music stops blarin'
And the five-headed announcer stops caring.
No one's watching the alien race, anyway.
What a horrible host planet
For the Grand Prix Milky Way.
Written by
Clive Culverhouse
Categories:
fun, funny, humanity, humor, humorous, science fiction, world,
Alien Invasion
I don’t have a basement
there’s no hills here to run to
no caves for miles around
haven’t stockpiled tins of beans
or tomatoes
or peach slices
panic buying hasn’t been bought
no guns no knives
except cutlery
and I’m not a film star
getting out of impossibilities
saving the world with nice teeth
so I guess I’ll just stay in bed
or pull up a chair
watching it all eating crisps
Written by
Luke Kenneth Casson Leighton
Categories:
funny, parody, song-
Mama Was An Alien
my mama was an alien,
my daddy was an engineer,
and i was spawned
from the borg one morn
with keyboards in my ears,
in my eeeeearrs.
they call me the microsoft hacker,
once upon a pair of wires,
and i'm gooonne
[crack my numbers]
i wonder how your PC's feeln'
[ba ba ba baaaa]
scoot down the wires,
[crack my numbers]
i wonder how your PC's feeln'
[ba ba ba baa baa]
Written by
Elton Camp
Categories:
funny,
Alien Abductions Come To An End
Alien Abductions Come To An End
By Elton Camp
Thousands claim that aliens took them away
Performed probing medical exams they say
Coming here, they must think their time is worth
To learn details about life forms found on earth
The story I have heard is true I will now relate
As to why there’ve been no abductions of late
A pair of aliens with big heads and bug eyes
Probed the wrong earthling and got a surprise
They decided such exams were not wise to do
They backed up gagging & calling out “Phew”
Written by
Larry Belt
Categories:
funny
Alien
Now I don't believe in UFOs
But aliens do exist
Somebody tell the government
There's something that they missed
For I have seen with my own eyes
This thing from worlds unknown
Sometimes it tries to contact me
When it calls me on the phone
Tho I've never seen a spaceship
I know it's from outer space
For there is not a human
With such a hideous face
For those of you who've read my poems
You know this thing I saw
Yes I'm sorry to say again
It's just my mother-in-law
Written by
Kieran Mason
Categories:
earth, humorous,
Poor Little Alien
He got out of his spaceship and looked around
No human life form could not be found
Where are the humans he thought to himself
All inside dear alien protecting our health
This alien took his spaceship to another place
Hoping to find I'm sure a friendly human face
The other place was just the same as before
No human life found was strange for sure
So into the spaceship this alien decided to go
Visiting earth today proved a devastating blow
Finally he arrived home on the milky way
Thinking he would visit earth another day
Written by
Rajat Kanti Chakrabarty
Categories:
funny, humor, nonsense,
An Alien Snatched My Wife One Strange Night
An alien snatched my wife one strange night,
To planet Speed, they took her in flight.
But the alien confessed,
She'd been sorely unimpressed,
So back home, he returned her, contrite.