These are funny poems written by international poets. Funny poems are added daily and hundreds of new funny poems are added weekly for your reading pleasure.
Poem Details | by
Peranteau, James |
Categories:
humor,
.
hoist it up mate
fer
she wakes
gotta see
her
purty
shadow
fer see
her'z
mine
mangled
breeches
*did ya know; pirates wore patches
to see their way in the dark. So they
say; "covering one eye made the other
see better at night"
Poem Details | by
Wolf, Gershon |
Categories:
giggle, leadership,
to ‘stumble’ ...
improved repertoire ~
adds ‘mumble’
Poem Details | by
Dietrich, Andrea |
Categories:
humorous,
Running with terror onto the lawn,
they gathered outside my house,
along with me and the birthday “boy,” my spouse.
No more celebrating in the dining room would be going on.
All my guests said bye and left, for simply having seen a mouse!
Poem Details | by
Goldsmith, Paula |
Categories:
fun, giggle, mom, son, sun, today, uplifting,
I went for my early morning run,
just me and my young son.
It was to be a lot of fun,
then home for a hot cross bun.
We waved to Mary's grandson,
then it had all begun.
My shoe came untied.
I almost died.
Come on one spiritual guide,
I cried.
One must hold on to their pride,
disaster is about to show real wide.
Down I went,
did the concrete now have a dent?
It all peeked off to the bright morning sun.
Poem Details | by
Clarke, W J |
Categories:
dog, humor,
The alpha canine stood under the tree
Such doggy wisdom does not come for free
“If you bury your bone
please remember the zone
Now form an orderly queue while I pee”
Poem Details | by
Sarvida Jr., Hugo |
Categories:
engagement, hilarious, humor, meaningful,
If you like rich men
You can wait for me to win
The lottery first.
Poem Details | by
Mckeithan, Oliver |
Categories:
fish, fishing, funny,
there was an old flounder named May
who lived in the Chesapeake Bay
each day was a test
and he considered himself blessed
if he survived being made catch of the day
Poem Details | by
Mckeithan, Oliver |
Categories:
funny,
Funny
Your laughter when
None is called for, is
Not funny
Unless I can
Find it funny too
*Reverse Acrostic*
Poem Details | by
Gayagay, Ryan |
Categories:
funny, science,
A scientist said to his mate
“We came from the line of primate!”
Said one of the men,
While waving his pen,
“Refer to yourself, not us, mate.”
An ape heard the scientist say
That men share the same gene as they.
The ape proudly said,
“You’d wish you were dead--
Insult us no more or you’ll pay.”
Poem Details | by
Crandall, David |
Categories:
beach, humor,
He vacationed with his girlfriend in France,
Where, on the beach, he averted his glance.
Ignoring all the heat,
He kept cool and discreet,
While he carefully adjusted his pants.
'Twas praiseworthy how he tried not to look.
He cautiously put his nose in a book.
Big and itty-bitty,
What he missed, a pity,
'Til his girlfriend said, "please help me unhook."
Poem Details | by
Coon, Charles |
Categories:
humorous, i am, words,
Direct immediacy..
Seems to be
A pretty good map
To find This..
Time is shattered
Space explodes to
A vast unknown..
Hold on..
Are we there yet..?
Poem Details | by
Lawless, John |
Categories:
humor, word play,
Heretically speaking
…I am at odds with myself
Poem Details | by
Etgen-Baker, Sara |
Categories:
humor, journey,
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Henry carried his house on his back,
He could get up and leave, no need to pack.
Although travel was slow
For this escargot
He traveled alone, made his own track.
Although it took him many years
Henry finally made it to Algiers.
The city was so grand
After trekking through sand,
Leaving a trail of slime, sweat, and tears.
Poem Details | by
Kitchin, Tania |
Categories:
funny, humor,
Jill was out on a leisurely stroll
When she suddenly needed to go
Her thighs she tightly squeezed
And headed for the trees
But tripped and fell, pants now wet, oh no!
Roy went for his early morning run
Soon his too full bladder pain begun
There were no nearby trees
Only surf with a breeze
Then dove into the waves until done
Max liked to eat spicy Mexican food
But his raw stomach was not in the mood
Now doubled over with gas
He let a loud fart to pass
Now stuck in the booth with pants soiled and glued
Poem Details | by
Rodrigues, Kim |
Categories:
humor,
“That’s all I can stands, ‘cause I can’t stands no more.”
—Popeye, Popeye the Sailor animated series
One episode, “The Fistic Mystic,”
takes place in Badgag, a parody of Bagdad.
Mountebank
Olive Oil,
a snake charmer.
Bluto
wraps around her.
He is a shyster -
a bully
with tricks.
One pop eye
on him -
the sailor
misdirects.
Mischief in Badgag -
a mountebank devil,
picked
the wrong g-oil.
Poem Details | by
Ward, Daisy |
Categories:
humor,
On a banana peeling he slipped
That caused him to have a large dipped
On the side of his leg
So, he had to beg
But it seemed like a movie scripted
Poem Details | by
Ward, Daisy |
Categories:
humorous,
For last glance
The family lined up to say
Their good-byes and that's
When a blind man
Comes to close
He falls and knocks
Over the casket
The dead man rolls out
Onto the floor, then opens
Up his eyes and
Then tells the blind man
To watch where the hell
He’s WALKING!
Poem Details | by
Ward, Daisy |
Categories:
fun, humor,
His expensive watches were fakes
That he passed off on his dates
Got busted by one
Who realized what he’d done
He tried to sucker the wrong mate
Poem Details | by
Ward, Daisy |
Categories:
dog, humor,
The dogs were line up to pee
On what was a special oak tree
Frigid, but waited in line
All thoughts had crossed their mind
Peeing on the tree made them feel glee
Poem Details | by
Crandall, David |
Categories:
humor,
Perry's Disinclination for Mushrooms
A mushroom is not something new
Inside some pasta or a stew.
But, when it comes to feeding Perry,
A mushroom is extraordinary!
John's Surgery
An eyeball must be a perfect sphere.
If an imperfection should appear,
A handy doctor, not ham-handed,
Will use his head and have it sanded.
Poem Details | by
Aller, Jake |
Categories:
environment, god, religion,
April 17—Prove something
God’s Demented Sense of Humor
I sometimes think
That God if he/she/it exists
And created the Universe
Must have a demented
Sense of humor.
For how else you can explain
Why he created a parasite
That hides in your system
Totally inert but if you take
Steroids for any reason.
Blows up like a basketball
Bursting out and killing you,
In thirty minutes.
Leaving the doctors
Wondering WTF
Just happened.
Recording your death
As a medical mystery.
As very few doctors
Have ever encountered
Or heard about
This weird parasite.
Poem Details | by
Crandall, David |
Categories:
animal, humor,
The platypus excels at evolution
And displays a super cool solution
For making his way amidst the muck,
He don't run aground. He don't get stuck.
Of this, the platypus would never dream
As a self-respecting monotreme.
Indeed, a platypus of station
Will employ electrolocation.
Poem Details | by
Crandall, David |
Categories:
bird, humor,
Birdwatchers try to name us,
Wishing they could be us;
But you cannot blame us,
If, despite who sees us,
Whatever fate befalls us,
We don’t care what they calls us.
Poem Details | by
Poet, Hilo |
Categories:
analogy, appreciation, character, giggle, imagery, lost, perspective,
trip yourself my way
no siesta at borders
cross right for a swim
until you're breathless and lost
to my words~first to my place
Poem Details | by
Pookie, Huzaif |
Categories:
art, butterfly, care, feelings, funny love, innocence,
Dancing in my heart,some friendship it seems
a solace butterfly , fluttering it seems
a moon with many faces,all bright it seems
for love is freedom,all pure it seems
To the melody of my heart,
all lubb dubb it seems.
In the melody of one's flute,
there's you too,it seems.
All Funny Poems